


Worth the Fall

by Desirae



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Barely There Angst, Boys In Love, Dean/Cas Big Bang Challenge 2017, Fallen Angel Castiel, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Porn with Feelings, Teacher Dean, True Love, movies on the beach
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-26
Updated: 2017-10-26
Packaged: 2019-01-23 05:02:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 25,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12499340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Desirae/pseuds/Desirae
Summary: The angel Castiel was stationed on Earth to observe, not interact. When he takes it upon himself to intervene in an accident that would have claimed the life of Kindergarten teacher, Dean Winchester, there were consequences.Stripped of most of his powers, Castiel is forced to live as a mortal for one year. But after getting to know the man who led to his fall from grace, the angel soon discovers that he has a choice to make. Return to his post when his punishment is over and never see Dean again, or give up his near immortality to take a chance at a life on Earth with the human he has come to love.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, everyone! Here is my contribution to this year's DCBB, I hope you all enjoy it. This story was loosely inspired by egoscsajszy’s Destiel movie trailer The Fall, which is an amazing video.
> 
> Love&thanks to my beta and teapot, Bekki, who is my sounding board in all things important in life, and this fic, all hours, day and night. Muah!
> 
> Thank you to my amazing artist, MissMelissa17, who not only did fabulous artwork for this story, but also helped with betaing as well. Please show her some love [here:)](https://miss-melissa17.livejournal.com/4554.html)
> 
> I also want to give huge kudos to Muse&Jojo who did a phenomenal job taking over the DCBB reins this year. You ladies rock.
> 
> You can find me here on [Twitter](https://mobile.twitter.com/DesiraeSterite) and [Tumblr](https://desiraelovesdestiel.tumblr.com)

 

 

He wasn’t supposed to interfere. It was forbidden. _Observe only_. But Castiel couldn’t have stopped himself if he tried. The man’s soul shone so brightly and standing there in the vessel of one James Novak-he could see that it was about to be snuffed out. There was really no choice in the matter.

A shriek of tires, the sound of bones breaking-too low for human ears to hear. It all happened in a flash, and Castiel was there. Cradling the human in front of the out of control pick-up truck. Wide moss green eyes, clouded in pain and shock, stared up at him. Blood from a soon to be fatal head wound without a miraculous intervention, dripped down a truly spectacular face. Castiel soothed the man, brushing his healing hands over broken ribs and a punctured lung. He ran his fingers through blood-matted hair the color of burnt honey. He smiled softly down at the man in his arms, taking a moment to soak in the gloriousness of his iridescent soul, and the constellation of freckles across the bridge of his nose. The man attempted to speak, but Castiel just shook his head. _“Shhh,”_ he whispered, before touching two fingers to his sweat dampened forehead and putting him to sleep.

He had told the police, as the stranger- _Dean Winchester-_ was loaded up in an ambulance to be brought to the hospital, that he’d simply been at the right place at the right time, to push the man out of harm’s way. He gave them the name of his vessel, and out of work phone number.

Castiel stood on the sidewalk on Main Street in _Starfish Bay, Rhode Island._ The crowd finally started to disperse as Dean Winchester’s ambulance slipped into traffic, sirens blaring. Castiel’s trench coat billowed in the balmy late spring breeze, as he looked on in disdain as the cops hauled a nearly unconscious man from the haphazardly parked truck in the road. Castiel wrinkled his nose in disgust as empty beer cans were unintentionally dragged out with the man’s booted feet.

Castiel turned and walked away, heading down the side street that led to the bluff overlooking the bay. Castiel stood and waited to be called home.

* * *

 

  


“Josie, if I see you put paste in Kevin’s hair again, you will leave the craft table, are we clear?”  Kindergarten teacher Dean Winchester watched as the little auburn haired girl poked her lip out in a pout.

“Come here, Kevin, “ Charlie Bradbury, Dean’s teacher’s assistant stood, moving from the playdough station, to take the young boy’s hand. Dean smiled as Charlie led Kevin to the sink in the back, wetting a paper towel, then pulling it through the boy’s jet black hair.

“Alright guys, show me what you got,” Dean said to his crew at the half-moon shaped table. He shifted in the child-sized blue plastic chair, careful not to knock his knees underneath. God, he hated these butt-numbing atrocities.

“Here, Uncle Dean, look. I stayed in all the lines!”

Dean looked at his niece, proudly displaying a triangle shaded in every color in the crayon box.

“That’s excellent, Evie, but don’t forget: at school, I’m Mr. Winchester.”

Evelyn Winchester’s honey blonde brows winged up as she shrugged sheepishly. “Sorry Uncle De-Mr. Winchester. I forgotted.”

“Forgot, and that’s okay,” Dean bit the inside of his cheek to keep the laughter in. His niece was adorable, his pride and joy, but he really tried not to give her special treatment.

“Alright tiny humans, five minutes until afternoon recess and pick up. Let’s finish up our projects and make sure our backpacks are ready to go home.”

Afternoon recess was one of his favorite times of day, and not just because it was almost time for him to leave. He loved watching his crazy kids expel all the energy they had into imaginative play and seeing their faces light up as they saw their parents or guardians come through the gate to pick them up.

Dean worked at The Little Red Schoolhouse, a preschool center with a private Kindergarten. One of the benefits for parents was that instead of a half day of schooling which created a mad scrambling for working parents to find child care, LRSH offered all day kindergarten, as well as providing infant and toddler care, preschool and pre-k classes. The school also accepted vouchers for low income families, as sometimes the cost of child care was nearly equal to a parent’s weekly paycheck.

Dean had fallen into teaching accidentally. He’d needed a summer job when he was eighteen, after his Uncle Bobby’s salvage yard went out of business. His neighbor, Missouri Moseley, owned the Little Red School House, and offered the teen a job as a teacher’s aide.

He’d fallen in love with it. Perhaps it was because he had practically raised his kid brother growing up. Dealing with an absent, alcoholic father and taking care of a young child at the early age of eleven had given Dean endless patience, which was essential when dealing with young children.

Missouri had been impressed with Dean. The school had a program where they would reimburse for schooling if an employee became certified and signed a contract with the school for a minimum of three years. For Dean, it hadn’t even been a question. Dean took the money he’d saved during the summer, combined with the money he hadn’t already put aside for Sammy’s new school clothes and taken the classes at the local community college. Missouri had reimbursed him, and Dean took that money and used it to continue his schooling, earning his Bachelor’s in early and elementary education. Although Dean could teach kindergarten through sixth grade, he had chosen to stay at the Little Red Schoolhouse when his three year contract was up. He’d worked at the school sixteen years now and he’d never regretted the decision.

Dean stood with Charlie on the playground, watching as Evie and Kevin stood at the fence in the back. Dean could see them tracking the movement of something. Evie picked up whatever it was and thrust it towards Lilith who promptly screamed shrilly.

“Jiminy Crickets, Lilith, it’s jus’a caterpillar,” Evie said with a sassy cock of her hip.

The LRSH playground was encased by a chain link fence, surrounded by pine and red maple trees, and the caterpillars and inchworms had been insane that season.

“Evie, put that down and go wash your hands. Krissy?” Dean tagged the floating aide, a young high school girl named Krissy Chambers, to bring Evelyn to the bathroom.

“Kevin, if you touched it, I want you to go with Evie and Krissy to wash your hands. Gypsy moth caterpillars can give you a rash.”

Kevin scrunched up his little face. “Yuck.”

Dean wholeheartedly agreed.

It was a beautifully clear summer day in late June. At 4:30, the preschool and pre-k classes  merged with the kindergarten outside on the playground.  After passing over his student sign-out clipboard to Charlie, Dean waved to his co-workers. He yelled goodbye to the kids, earning him multiple around the legs hugs. His niece, whose mother Ruby would pick her up at 5:30 to go straight to dance class, caught him on the way back into the classroom.

“Bye, Uncle Dean,” Evie said.

“See ya later, kiddo,” Dean said, giving her a quick kiss on the head.

Dean took a final sweep over the classroom, before stopping by the office to say goodbye to Missouri. The school director sat in her small office, door open. Dean paused outside of the doorway where the wide counter housed a fish tank that the kids were able to take turns feeding each day sat. He took his time card out of the slot and punched the time clock next to the fish food. After, he poked his head in, smiling at his boss.

“Night Missouri,” Dean said, and shrewd chocolate eyes met his green irises.

“You have yourself an illuminating weekend,” she said, soft voice full of mystery.

Dean had learned long ago not to question what Missouri meant when she said the things she did sometimes.

“I’ll certainly try,” he said appeasingly and Missouri just smirked knowingly on his way out the door.

Dean stepped outside and walked around the wide brick building to the back parking lot where Baby sat. Baby was a 1967 black Chevy Impala that had been a gift from his Dad to his mother before they got married. It had been their pride and joy until his mother had been killed in a head on collision by a drunk moron in a Dodge pickup. Dean had been eleven and it was the day that his seven year old brother Sammy became less like his brother and more like his son. It was Dean who kept Sam fed while their father began drinking his life away. It was Dean who kept the house clean, who did the shopping and who tucked Sammy into bed at night. Dean balanced the checkbook when Mom’s life insurance came through, making sure to pay off the mortgage on their small three bedroom house in Starfish Bay, which he would later come to own.

John Winchester’s retired military stipend had paid for most of the rest, but Dean got himself a paper route at fifteen and began saving his weekly paychecks for extra things they needed, like field trips for Sammy and groceries since much of that budgeted money was being invested in Jim Beam and Jack Daniels.

By sixteen, Dean was working in his Uncle Bobby’s salvage yard, up until it closed it’s doors. He’d put his money in a savings account for what would later become Sam and eventually his, college funds. Sam, going to Brown University on scholarship, but still needing to pay for a meal plan for a growing moose, and school books.

Dean unlocked his car and slid inside, always feeling comforted by the soft leather of the seats. When Mary Winchester had died, John wanted nothing more to do with the car. He sold it to Bobby, telling him to do what he wanted with it. Bobby had immediately put the title in Dean’s name and had helped him rebuild the damaged car. Helping Bobby fix her up helped give him a little closure about his Mom’s death. Despite the horrific way she had died, the car had meant the world to her and Dean knew she would be happy to see what excellent care he took of it.

Dean debated about whether or not he wanted to go to _Happy Garden_ or just get a pizza at  _Papa Gino’s_. When Dean pulled up to the intersection that would lead him to main street, he felt his heart rate pick up a little bit. It had only been a little over a month since the incident. The moment where he was nearly run down by a drunk driver and rescued by an angel with the bluest eyes he had ever seen. Of course, he wasn’t a real angel. Just a man. James Novak. He’d tried to find him, just to say thank you. He remembered waking up in the hospital with those cerulean orbs burned on his brain. All he had wanted to know was who he was and where to find him. And then maybe he’d have answers. Answers to questions that he had about how the man had managed to push him out of the way, with not a single scratch, when Dean was positive he could feel his bones breaking and his head explode in pain.

Deciding on Chinese, Dean parallel parked on the strip across from the restaurant. He got out of his car, locking up behind himself and steadfastly ignored looking across the street to the music shop he’d had his near death experience in front of. Instead, he walked into the restaurant, smiling at Mei behind the counter. He didn't even have to say his order, they knew it by heart by now. Pad Thai, medium hot, with chicken.

As Dean sat at one of the small tables, the traditional reedy music playing softly in the background, his phone buzzed. He took it out and saw that he had a text from Benny. Benny was an officer for the Starfish Bay Police department. Dean swiped his finger across the screen to open the message. His heart tripped a bit when he read it.

_5:15 pm From Benny: I found him, brother._

Finally.


	2. Chapter 2

Shock. Pin pricks of pain. There was a sensation of being burned from the inside out. There was no sight, not really. Just flashes like those on a stormy night. Bright, dark, bright, dark, overlapping so rapidly his eyelids fluttered in pain. Down, down, in a twisting spiral. A voice echoed as he made his descent. _One year of penance, Castiel. One year then you may return to the host, or choose to live amongst the humans as a mortal._ The voice of his father faded until there was nothing but darkness-silent and deep.

* * *

 

 

                                                

The first thing Castiel became aware of was the smell. It was briny, the wind carrying with it salt that kissed his dry lips. Behind his closed lids he could feel the breeze ruffle his hair as the sun baked his skin, making it feel tight. Castiel could hear the sound of gulls calling and the uncomfortable sting of sand from where his dress shirt had ridden up.

He opened his eyes.

For a moment, Castiel was blinded. The sun shone directly over his head, hurting his corneas, causing him to tear up and squint. Castiel lifted his hand to shield his eyes and only managed to pepper his face with sand as a reward.

Castiel sat up, brushing sand off of the back of his head. He licked his lips with a tongue that felt like cotton. Castiel took stock of his surroundings. He sat, beige trench coat rucked up behind him, blue striped tie eskew. His long suit pants had sand filled cuffs and one of his shoes was a few feet away from him. He had apparently landed on a beach. The tide was coming in as he sat amongst the sand and sea grass.

“This is extremely uncomfortable,” he muttered out loud as he hoisted himself up. He shook out each leg and then did a one footed hop as he attempted to put on his other loafer, despite his sand filled trouser sock.

His whole body ached. Though he couldn't see them, his wings felt cramped and he stretched them out, where they fluttered unseen on a parallel plane. His muscles were sore and his feet felt like he was walking on pins and needles. Although this vessel had been his for years, it was the first time he was experiencing sensation without his grace for a buffer. Oh, it was still there, humming beneath the surface, but it was dull. He imagined should he be injured, he would still be able to heal, but it would no doubt be slow. He definitely could not fly. His stomach felt uncomfortable, a gnawing feeling that caused his abdomen to gurgle and Castiel suspected it was hunger. His body was requiring sustenance, and if he wasn’t mistaken by the pressure he was feeling in his bladder, he also needed to urinate.

Castiel’s vessel used to belong to one James Novak. James had been a devout Christian who went by the name of Jimmy. A quiet family man who sold airtime on AM radio. He was an only child who had married his high school sweetheart, and had lost his parents to a heart attack and lung cancer respectively. Still, throughout, Jimmy had kept faith in God and himself. When he and his wife Amelia and their daughter Claire had been in a head on collision with a Winnebago who’s driver had fallen asleep, Jimmy had been given a choice. To join his wife and daughter in Heaven or to continue on and enter the next chapter of his life. Jimmy had chosen the glory of Heaven, happily relinquishing his body to Castiel. On the few occasions Castiel had needed to interact with humans, it was Jimmy’s name he had used. James Novak had no family to speak of and Amelia’s sister had never taken steps to keep in contact with Jimmy after the tragic death of her sister and niece.

Castiel would do his penance here, as he knew this place had been chosen for a reason. Here was where he had made what Heaven deemed a mistake, and here was where he would have to serve his punishment.

Castiel surveyed the beach spread out in front of him, thankful it appeared fairly deserted. Down the sand slope and to the left about a quarter mile away, Castiel could just make out a jetty and small dots of what he knew to be humans, milling around. There was a wooden boardwalk about ninety feet away, with a sign fixed in the sand at the end that declared that he was on Plover Beach.

Castiel decided that people who jogged through beach sand for fun were quite obviously not in complete control of their mental faculties. By the time he had reached the beach parking lot, he imagined he could have drank an entire lake, and his kidneys were now aching with the need to relieve himself. When he went into the public restroom he inquired to the one person in there about the annoyance that was urinating. All he received in return was a look that suggested perhaps _he_ was the one without all of his faculties.

After cleaning up as best as he could, Castiel stepped back outside. He’d need to work out how to get some food first, because the hunger pains were going past what he could comfortably ignore.

When Castiel was once again back in the parking lot, his grace hummed again, nudging him towards looking at a man, shorter than his own six foot frame, leaning against a Pathfinder. The man had golden hair that curled over his collar, and was currently feeding a flock of seagulls out of a sleeve filled with _McDonald’s_ french fries. There was a sad, pathetic moment when Castiel actually debated about fighting the scavenger birds for the deep fried potatoes.

Suddenly the man turned, his gaze licking on Castiel. The man waggled his brows. “Hey there, Cassie. Let’s get a move on. Lots of stuff to go over,”  the man said, tossing the now empty sleeve into the trash can and brushing his hands on his jeans.

It took Castiel longer than it would have had he been at full power, but in the end there was no way to mistake the playful, mischievous person in front of him as anyone other than his black sheep arch angel brother. Castiel felt his lips curl up in a half smile as for the first time since he woke up, he felt some semblance of hope.

“Hello, Gabriel.”


	3. Chapter 3

Gabriel, Castiel learned over the next few weeks, was to be his liaison. His words, not Castiel’s. Gabriel provided him with a few suits, some basic undergarments and hygiene necessities. Castiel discovered that he did not like mint toothpaste, but cinnamon was delicious and that it was indeed hard to function in the morning without coffee.

Gabriel had set Castiel up in a studio apartment in the center of town, near the bus stops and within walking distance of the grocery stores, novelty shops and the Gas ‘n’ Sip, where Gabriel had somehow procured him a job.

Gabriel, it turned out, had a very spacious beachfront condo, which he’d paid for by being the owner of the _Casa Erotica_ franchise. Castiel’s initial reaction had been shock, followed by the need to chastise thoroughly, which of course, fell on deaf ears. All it had accomplished was Gabriel throwing Castiel a box of condoms and a bottle of lubrication with the helpful warning to _wrap it before you tap it._

The apartment was paid for through the summer, but come September 1st, he would be required to provide eight hundred and fifty dollars a month to continue to have a roof over his head. Castiel was provided with James Novak’s social security card. His license, Castiel was already in possession of. Gabriel flitted in and out while Castiel dealt with living, essentially, as a human.

He learned the hard way to not press so hard when shaving and had just resigned himself to have a permanent stubble. He learned that he was fond of peanut butter and jelly, but found fluff to be too sweet, and frankly, too messy.

Castiel discovered that aside from the bodily functions he wasn’t fond of, came the typical ‘morning wood’ he’d heard of but never experienced before. He took care of that when he showered, in quick, fast strokes. A perfunctory ritual that was merely a means to an end.

Castiel learned that if he didn’t drink enough water, that he would get leg cramps and discovered that jogging was something that cleared his mind and helped him sleep. Sleep was a disorienting experience. The first few times he had slept it was only because his body had simply given out; he passed out at his small kitchen table, mid-bite, in a bowl of easy mac. Once, he was sitting in the park, and startled awake by some children who came to fly kites. It made him a little homesick for his favorite Heaven, the eternal Tuesday afternoon of an autistic man who drowned in a bathtub in 1953.

Sometimes he dreamed and that was an experience in itself. Sometimes he woke up, gasping, at the assault of phantom aches and pains. But sometimes, he had dreams of moss green eyes and full, pink lips. Those dreams were soothing, though he often awoke with a feeling of loss. He couldn’t help but to wonder how Dean Winchester was now.

He often thought of checking up on him, the man who had jumpstarted him on the path that led him to where he was now. He wondered if Dean was happy. Was he married? Did he have a large family that he had dinner with every Sunday? Castiel could not imagine that someone with such a bright and luminous soul could be alone.

Castiel glanced at the Uline wall clock hanging in the Gas ‘n' Sip. Five minutes until 6pm. It was almost time for his break. Castiel had taken to packing himself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a capri sun that he would eat on one of the benches across the street that lined the sidewalks. There was one every block on either side and Castiel enjoyed people watching while he ate. Families enjoying ice cream cones or tourist resting their aching feet after a day shopping for souvenirs.

Castiel heard the bell ding in the front of the store. He didn’t look up, as he printed out a powerball ticket for the woman in front of him. It wasn’t until a deep voice with a warm timbre addressed him that he raised his eyes.

“I’ll have some beef jerky and a pack of menthols.”

Castiel looked up into wide oceans of sea green eyes, crinkling at the corners. They captivated him, along with the smile the man flashed. Castiel opened his mouth to speak. For something, anything to come out of his mouth that wasn’t random nonsense.

“But you don’t smoke.”

Like that.

* * *

  
  
  


Dean had to admit that he was a little aggravated to discover that James Novak was working right in the center of town and they hadn’t crossed paths once in the entire month he’d been searching for him. If Benny hadn’t noticed him at the Gas ‘n’ Sip while he was filling up his patrol car, who knows when he would have gotten another chance. Dean looked at the food in the passenger seat, at the extra fork and napkins, and knew he was being overly hopeful, but not being able to help himself.

Dean stepped out of the Impala and steepled his hands over her hood. Through the glass of the convenience store, he could see a man behind the register. He had dark hair and a strong profile. He was clad in Gas ‘n’ Sip blue and white. It was hard for Dean to reconcile this man doing his nine to five, so to speak, with the blue-eyed angel who had saved his life...and haunted his dreams.

Dean pushed off of Baby’s hood and headed for the door. The automated bell rang as he entered, signaling his presence in the store. The wash of cool air felt awesome, drying the sweat coating his skin. Summer in Starfish Bay was beautiful, but it was also humid as hell.

Dean made his way to the register, standing behind a woman waiting for her lottery slip. Dean heard James wish the woman luck on her gambling and was taken aback by the rich gravel of his voice. There was a voice he could listen to for days. Dean felt himself smiling before he went with a disarming joke.

“I’ll have some beef jerky and a pack of menthols.”

When the man’s cobalt eyes met his, Dean felt an immediate connection.He couldn’t believe how instantaneously comforted the man’s gaze made him feel. He looked at him, Dean thought, much like a bird. Head cocked, expression filled with curiosity and a little bit of confusion. He also smelled...heavenly. Ozone, sunshine and earth.

“But you don’t smoke,” came that gorgeous gritty voice again. Dean was about to ask him how he knew that when his savior’s nametag caught his attention. _Steve_.

“I thought your name was James?” Dean asked, and the handsome man bit his lip.

“My name is Castiel.”

 _Hmm, fake name, like his phone number_ Dean thought to himself, wondering what the reason was for the deception. Castiel didn’t look like someone who caused trouble. Even if Dean wasn’t biased because the man saved him, Dean could just tell. There was something innately good about Castiel and Dean would give anything to get to know the man better.

“Heya, Cas. I’m Dean Winchester, and I have been searching for you for the last month so I could thank you for saving my life.”

“Hello, Dean. And you are more than welcome.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

To say that Castiel was surprised that Dean had searched him out would be a lie. To say that some part of himself wasn't secretly thrilled would be as well.

Dean rubbed the back of his neck and looked at Castiel sheepishly. Castiel noticed a slight flush crawling up the man's neck and couldn't help but find it endearing.

Dean cleared his throat,” I don't know what time you get off, but I was hoping we could go somewhere and talk?”

Castiel's eyebrows winged up at that. He supposed no harm could be had from talking to the man. And technically, it was his break. Castiel found himself nodding his head, and asking Dean to wait a moment as he went to the back to let Nora know that he was leaving for his dinner break. Nora was a very pleasant woman to work for, a young, attractive single mother with an adorable two-year-old named Tanya. Castiel took pride in the fact that in the short time he'd gotten to know her, Nora had seen that he was fit to man the store in the evenings, so that she could be home with her baby. Castiel worked the 12 pm to midnight shift Monday through Friday, and a short 9am to 12pm on Saturdays, just to be there for deliveries. Sunday was his day off, and he tended to spend it alone, quietly reading or sitting in the park watching people go about their daily lives. He hadn't been able to bring himself to go into a church yet, because despite the fact that he knew he had broken Heaven's rules, he still felt as though his punishment was severe and a little unjust. Castiel could see no reason why he should be reprimanded for saving the life of a human whose soul was so bright that it could literally bring tears to one's eyes.

Castiel grabbed his paper bag from his locker, hoping that Dean would not be too upset if he ate while they talked. When he came back from the back room Nora was already at the register and Dean was waiting casually by a stack of magazines. Castiel raised eyebrow when he saw him fingering a plastic encased Busty Asian Beauties. When Dean met his eyes, he flushed even more, and Castiel gave a huff of laughter. He may have been an angel, but he knew what pornography was, and what its uses were.

“Did you wish to purchase that magazine before we begin  our chat?”

Dean's eyes widened, and he hastily stepped back from the rack of magazines.

“Naw, man I'm good.”

“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about you know,” Castiel said with a smile.

Dean laughed heartily, and it was a musical sound that Castiel enjoyed immensely. He hoped he would hear more of the laughter again soon.

“I'm not embarrassed,” Dean said, “ I just already have this one,” he finished with a sassy wink and Castiel laughed.

Dean walked over to the door and pushed it open, holding it wide for Castiel to pass through. The air was humid, a vast difference from the coolness of the convenience store.

“I usually walk across the street and sit on one of the benches and eat my dinner. Is it okay if we talk there? I don't like to go too far, because I fear I won't be back to work on time.”

Dean smiled at him, “That's fine, Cas. Now I don't know what you have in that sack there, but how do you feel about Pad Thai?”

Castiel knitted his brows in thought. That was a dish he’d yet to try, though Gabriel had been doing his damnedest to make sure Castiel ordered from at least one takeout place a week. So far he had had pizza, which was close to heavenly, tacos, which gave him indigestion, and the fisherman's platter from Rock Bottom Seafood which was his favorite by far.

“You brought me food?”

Again, Dean flushed appealingly. “Well, I know I was kind of jumping the gun, but I had hoped that maybe you'd be free to talk with me, and since it was close to dinner time, I figured you might be okay with sharing a meal as well.”

“I have never had Pad Thai before, but I would be delighted to share a meal with you, Dean.”

Dean’s smile was blinding, and he gestured over to a behemoth of a vehicle, shiny and black in obviously in tip-top condition. Dean pulled keys out of his leather jacket, and used them to open the door. Castiel watched him reach into the passenger seat and take out a brown bag stapled at the top. As they began to walk across the street, Dean asked if he had any preferences on benches, and Castiel chose the one directly across from the Gas ‘n’ Sip, though they faced Main Street. From their seats, they could see down the side streets in between the buildings. They led straight to the water and Castiel loved seeing those hints of blue, and smelling the ocean. It was ironic, that he would so enjoy the smell of the sea after waking so disoriented on the beach his first day as a resident of Earth.

For a few moments there was nothing but the sound of the evening crowd as they found their way down the streets in and out of shops. Dean easily broke open the stapled bag, and pulled out plastic forks wrapped in cellophane. He handed one to Cas, as well as a white container and a napkin. It smelled spicy, and it made his mouth water and his stomach growl. Dean gave a little chuckle at that, and Castiel eagerly opened the container and pulled his fork out of it's wrapping.

Castiel felt Dean's eyes on him as he forked up the first bite. Thick rice noodles and chicken covered in a delicious, tangy sauce exploded in a flavor burst on his tongue. He found himself humming in approval and Dean was looking at him with a fond expression.

“Is it a winner, then?”

Castiel nodded emphatically. He chewed, and swallowed before wiping his mouth with the napkin.

“It is most delicious, thank you very much for introducing me to it.”

Dean huffed and said,”Well, it's not exactly shoving someone out of the way of a car, but I figure I can work my way up.”

Castiel turned to look at the man sitting next to him, and laid a hand on his knee. He made sure that Dean was looking him in the eyes when he spoke.

“You owe me nothing, Dean. I only did what anyone else in my position would have done.”

Dean just shook his head. ”No, Cas, it's definitely not something just anyone would have done. Dude, you ran in front of a drunk driver for me. You could have been seriously injured, or killed. And for what? A stranger?” Dean shook his head again. “Part of me wants to ask you if you're a little bit crazy, but I'm just too damn grateful.”

Castiel chewed thoughtfully on a piece of broccoli before he spoke. How could he answer this question honestly? Yes, it is true that Castiel didn't think about himself when he rescued Dean. But honestly, he wouldn't have had to, it wasn't as though the truck would have been able to hurt him. The thing was, Castiel knew without a doubt that even if he had been able to be hurt, it would not have stopped him from rescuing this man. Castiel stared at him, the warm breeze ruffling his tawny hair, and sunlight dancing across his golden freckles.

“Do you remember much about what happened?” Castiel asked and Dean bit his lip in consideration. For a moment, he looked like he was very far away until he came back to himself and looked Castiel fully in the eyes.

“It's all very surreal. I dream about it, and sometimes I wake up in pain. It's crazy, because not a single inch of me was injured. I'm perfectly unscathed, all because of you. But, uh, the crazy thing is that I have this strong recollection of being hit. And I mean hit _hard_.” Dean said, looking at Castiel searchingly, and the angel felt a bit of guilt roll through him. ”I  remember feeling like a knife had gone through my chest, I couldn't breathe, and my head was pounding. I could have sworn I was hit in the head, and then all of the sudden there you were. And this is going to sound nuts, believe me, I know it sounds nuts. But for just a second there, I could have sworn that your eyes glowed. I mean, you have insanely beautiful blue eyes. You must know that, I'm sure it's nothing you haven't heard before. So I'm not trying to come onto you, please don't take it that way. But you have the bluest eyes I've ever seen and I could have sworn that they were lit up. Then next thing I remember was you touching my head before I woke up in a hospital, with my brother Sammy sitting by the bed.”

Castiel put his fork into the now empty container and closed it up. He looked at Dean and & sincerely, “I'm very sorry. It sounds like it was a very traumatic experience for you, and you're still dealing with it. I do hope you are getting enough sleep.”

Dean shot him a disarming smile and nodded. “I'm good, you don't have to worry about me, Cas. As long as I get my four hours I make do.“

Castiel's brows furrowed in concern. “That certainly doesn't sound like enough sleep, Dean. I hope you don't work with heavy machinery during the day.” He said it seriously, but Dean still laughed anyway.

“No, I teach kindergarten. Paste and Legos are pretty light, so I'm okay.”

Castiel felt himself give a beaming smile. Of course someone with a  soul as bright as Dean's would work with children. It was so very fitting.

“That must be very rewarding work.” Dean nodded as he grabbed both of their empty containers and stuck them in the brown paper bag crumbling them up and placing it next to himself on the bench.

“I freaking love it, which still surprises me to this day. When I was a kid I never thought I would want to be in a classroom all day every day. But watching those little munchkins soak up every bit of information you give them like sponges, is so rewarding. To know that you have some part in helping mold them into the people they're going to become is just a blessing that I'm so glad that I have.” Dean blushed. “Sorry, I get a little carried aw(ay sometimes. It's just that for the longest time I had only been interested in cars. I had wanted to be a classic car restorer. I restored my own car with my Uncle Bobby when I was a kid, and he had a salvage yard that I worked at when I was sixteen. But with the economy being the way it was, by the time I was eighteen it had shut down.”

“How did teaching come into play, then?”

Dean pointed a finger at Castiel and tskked with a wink. “Luckily, my neighbor Missouri owned a preschool with a private kindergarten. She offered me a job there the summer I graduated high school as a Teacher's Aid, and I never left,” Dean laughed, almost as though he was amused with himself.

Castiel found himself reaching out to squeeze Dean's hand. Dean looked down at their hands and smiled softly. “There's no shame in loving what you do, Dean. Those who enjoy their work tend to do it better than those who don't, wouldn't you agree?”

“You are definitely right about that. But we've spent this whole time talking about me, and I wanted to talk about you. Tell me all about... James? Steve? Castiel?” Dean waggled his eyebrows mischievously. “I gotta ask, Cas, are you on the run? Three different names, non-working number. Kind of seems to me like you didn't want to be found and I have to wonder if me showing up at your place is going to cause you some trouble?” Castiel could see that Dean had started the question jokingly, but was now really concerned he might be causing Castiel some unwanted problems.

“Not at all, Dean. I'm grateful for this opportunity to get to speak with you. I have often wondered since that day how you were, if you were happy, if you were coping well with everything since the incident. I just didn't want to intrude on you by showing up in your life. As for my name, Steve was the only name tag that was available. James is the name that was …  given to me, but Castiel is always what I've gone by.”

“And the phone number?”

Castiel's lips curved up in a half-smile. “I don’t have a phone. So I gave them an old number, even though it was a invalid one,” he shrugged sheepishly. Castiel took note of the darkening sky, orange, purple and pink blending together. “Dean, I certainly hate to end this lovely meeting, but I do need to get back to work. I hope you will come visit me again.”

Castiel thought it was very sweet that Dean walked him back to the store. But then he became curious when he entered the store as well. Castiel watched as Dean went over to one of the racks and picked up one of the $50 tracfones and a phone card. He brought it up to the register where Nora was still standing. Castiel watched Dean purchase the phone and open it up right on the counter. He looked on as Dean scratched off some sort of code on the back of the card he had purchased and entered a few buttons into the phone. Dean then turned around and strode right up to Castiel. He gave him a charming smile and handed the phone over.

“Here. Now you don't have a dead number. I put my name in there. Call me.”

It took Castiel a second to realize that Dean literally meant to call him right then. Castiel scrolled through the phone until he found the name _Dean_. When a buzzing sound came from Dean's pocket the green-eyed man grinned.

“There. Now I have your number, too. Text me when you get a chance. I'd really like to get to know you some more, if that's okay.”

Castiel smiled so wide his cheeks hurt. “I would really enjoy that, Dean. Thank you.”

Dean looked almost bashful when he saluted Castiel goodbye.

Ten minutes later found Castiel cleaning the slurpee machine when his new phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out and saw that he already had a message from Dean.

_From Dean: have a great rest of your night, Cas. Thanks for the company and thanks for the save. Talk to you soon._

Castiel felt warm all over his body, and he couldn't stop smiling for the rest of his shift. Even just the short time spent with Dean, made it clear to Castiel that saving his life was definitely worth the fall.


	5. Chapter 5

Dean didn't hear from Castiel until the following Friday. He had wanted to contact him earlier, but was afraid it would be pushing. He'd already insinuated himself into the man's life. So he was quite surprised when the phone buzzed in his pocket.

_8:15 a.m. From Cas: I don't believe I did the voicemail correctly._

The text came during morning recess and Dean found himself grinning like a loon. All of the classes combined in the morning until separating at 9 a.m. to split to their different classrooms. All except the infants and toddlers, who used the playground after the older children have gone inside.

Dean signaled to the preschool teacher, Garth Fitzgerald, and the Pre-K teacher, Hannah MacLeod, letting them know he was stepping outside of the gate to use the phone.

_8:21 a.m. From you: oh no. What did you do? Hang on. I'm going to call you, don't answer._

Dean waited a few minutes and called. After the first four rings, he heard the automated voice say _I'm sorry, the person you are trying to reach has a voice mailbox that isn't set up yet. Please try again later_.

 _8:23 a.m_. _From_ _you: yeah, dude, there is nothing there. You have to record your info AFTER the beep._

Dean looked over the fence, Garth and Hannah were still fine. There were only seven kids on the playground. The mad drop-off rush didn't really happen until quarter of nine anyway.

_8:25 a.m. From Cas: okay. I think I fixed it. Test for me?_

Dean dialed the number again, and this time he heard Castiel's voice. _This is my voice mail. Make your voice… a mail._ Dean found himself laughing out loud as he left a message.

“Well done, buddy I'll text you on my break.”

Dean ended the call and three other cars pulled into the lot for drop-off. One of them was his sister-in-law, Ruby. The brunette had an engaging smile and sass beyond measure. She was a good balance for Sammy's seriousness, and Dean loved her to death.

Dean watched as Ruby rushed to get Evie out of her booster seat. He met them at the gate and Ruby practically shoved his niece and her _Moana_ backpack into his arms.

“Dude, I am so late. I was only supposed to need Becky to cover my first period.” Ruby was the English teacher at Carver Edlund High School, named after the founder of Starfish Bay.

“They double booked at the pediatrician's again, and we wound up having to wait a half an hour for Evie's physical.”

“Things falling apart with Meg on maternity leave,” Dean said sympathetically.

Ruby rolled her eyes,”It's like they took any temp available.”

Megan Masters Banes was Dean's good friend Max's wife, and also Ruby's sister. She'd given birth to a beautiful baby girl named Alicia the month before and still had a few more weeks left before she had to return to work.

“Be good for Uncle Dean, baby girl,” Ruby said as Evie skipped through the gate, pigtails bouncing.

“It's Mr. Winchester at school, mama,” she sing-songed before darting off to find Kevin.

Ruby turned a speculative eye on him.”What's up with you, Winchester?”

“What do you mean?”

Ruby raised a brow,”You look all…” She waved a hand at him, “glowy.”

“Shut up,”’Dean scoffed,” I do not.”

Ruby laughed. “Yes you do. What happened? Oh my God, you met someone didn't you?”

Dean felt himself flush. “What? No I- aren't you late for work?”

Ruby shrugged. “I'm already late, five more minutes isn't going to make a difference. So what's her name?”

Dean looked away purposefully and Ruby snickered.

“Okay, so what's HIS name? You always blush harder when there's a boy involved,” she giggled.

Dean made a noise of offense, “I do not, now go to work, you slacker.”

“Fine, be that way. I'll just sic your brother on you.”

Dean huffed in annoyance. “Cas, all right? His name is Cas. And we haven't done anything, we just met. He's just a nice guy I want to get to know, okay?”

“Hey, Dean, it's okay,” the teasing ceased in Ruby’s voice. “Don't get defensive, your brother and I would be thrilled if you met someone you wanted to get serious with.”

“Well thanks,” Dean said, rubbing the back of his neck, as he was wont to do when he was nervous or embarrassed. “But it's new. I don't even know if he's into guys," Dean looked down at his watch. Quarter to nine, the rush would be coming in now. Dean needed to get back to his class. “Tell you what, if he turns out to be the love of my life, I'll be sure to let you guys know, okay?”

“Dean!” Garth called, “Lilith just threw up on the slide.”

Dean sent his eyes heavenward. Thank God it was Friday.


	6. Chapter 6

It had taken Castiel a while to work up the nerve to message Dean, but once he had, it was like the Icebreaker they both needed. They began to text each other daily, multiple times over the next few weeks. That texting later turned into dinner a few times a week as well. Dean would show up right before Castiel’s evening break with some new takeout to try.

_Here, these Burgers from Harvelle's will make you weep._

Sometimes it would be some concoction Dean came up with on his own. In time they learned a little more about each other.

_“So why did you move here with your brother, Cas?”_

_“I, um, I was let go from a previous position.”_

_Dean winced in sympathy.” That sucks, man. But I'm not going to lie, I'm happy to have met you.”_

Castiel warred with himself on whether or not to tell Dean the truth, but every time he came close, something would hold him back.

_“Where are you from, anyway?” Dean asked around a mouth full of KFC mashed potatoes._

_Castiel's spork paused midway to his mouth. He thought for a moment, finally settling on, “Up north.”_

_Dean cocked his brow. “Like, Massachusetts? Maine?”_

_Castiel laughed a little hysterically at that, he couldn't help himself. “No much further than that,” he said glancing up at the sky._

_“Awww, are you an angel who fell from Heaven, Castiel?”_

_Cas smiled at Dean warmly. “Would you believe me if I said yes?”_

_Dean stilled and stared into Cas’ eyes. “ I just might.”_

It was a Friday night at the end of July, when Castiel realized that he might actually be dating Dean Winchester. He supposed he should have picked up on it sooner, but he really had no basis for such things. And it wasn't like they had had some big talk. He had received a text from Dean asking him what he was doing the following night. After responding that he had nothing to do after his nine to twelve shift at the Gas ‘n' Sip, his phone rang.

Castiel double checked the locks of the store, before answering his phone.

“Heya, Cas,” Dean said in his ear, as Castiel began the short walk from his work to his small studio apartment. His voice caused warmth to curl in his belly.

“Hello, Dean. How was your day?”

“Well, no one threw up today, so that was a bonus. How about you? Any interesting customers at the good old Gas ‘n' Sip today?”

Castiel maneuvered his way down the sidewalk, carefully avoiding an inebriated couple leaving the Main Street Pub. The ever present smell of salt, and suntan oil was permeating the air, and Castiel breathed it in. He was really beginning to enjoy the scents and sights of living in a beach town.

“Just the usual,” Castiel said as he came upon his block. “There was an extremely high rate of Powerball ticket sales today.”

“Yeah, big jackpot Saturday. So you have nothing to do tomorrow?” Dean didn't wait for Castiel to respond, “Well, you do now.”

Castiel used his key to let himself into his building and then climb the three flights of stairs up to the studio apartment on the third floor. He walked in, and wondered if he was going to find Gabriel sitting on his couch, watching television. Castiel didn't have the money for such frivolities, but Gabriel insisted that television wasn't a luxury, but a necessity. Castiel would have been happy with just the couch and the bed that had been provided for him, but Gabriel had insisted. Castiel suspected that Gabriel was worried that without some form of mindless entertainment, Castiel would fall apart or worse, try and harm himself, while trying to deal with his punishment. Gabriel didn't know about Castiel's friendship with Dean. He was almost afraid to tell him about it, not wanting to get a lecture about how forming an attachment with the person who was the reason for his downfall in the first place wasn't a good idea.

“I'm always happy to spend time with you, Dean. What exactly did you have in mind?” Castiel turned on the television for background noise, and went into the bedroom to undress for the evening. “Wait-uh, hang on,” Cas stripped down to his undershirt and boxers and left his socks on, because Castiel found that his extremities were often a little chilled. He suspected it was from really feeling the environment now that his grace wasn't a buffer between his body and the outside elements. Cas hoped that whatever Dean had planned would be later in the afternoon, because he was in sore need of doing the laundry. He only had three suits, and they all needed a good washing. “Okay, go ahead.”

“How would you feel about a movie on the beach?”

Castiel, who at this point had gone into the kitchen to prepare himself a hot cup of tea before bed, paused, perplexed.

“How exactly would that work, Dean?”

“It's actually really cool,” Deen said. “Everyone heads down to the beach with their blankets and maybe a packed picnic. My coworker, Hannah? Her husband Crowley and his best friend and brother, Arthur and Mick, do this for us every Saturday night for the whole month of August. They set up a projector right out on the water. Every year, the first week of August, is _Jaws_. I gotta tell you man, there's nothing like watching a movie about a shark live on the beach over the ocean.”

Castiel felt himself grinning widely, at the thought. Watching a movie, on the beach, on a blanket with Dean? There was definitely something very appealing about that scenario.

“That sounds absolutely lovely, Dean. Although, I have never seen _Jaws_.”

Silence, then finally, “I'm sorry, what? I could have sworn you just said you had never seen _Jaws_?”

“You you heard me correctly, Dean. Have I committed some sort of faux pas?”

Castiel worried his lip over the phone, letting out a relieved breath at Dean’s  soft chuckle. “I'm more than happy to school you in pop culture etiquette Cas, no worries.”

“What time should I meet you there?”

“How about I just come pick you up? I'll come grab you at 6:30, don't eat dinner, I'll pack us a picnic. And don't wear a suit.”

“But all I own are suits,” Castiel said, his voice taking on a panicked note. However, Dean just laughed, and the knot that was beginning to form in Cas' stomach loosened.

“Okay, well that settles what we're doing on Sunday if you're free. We need to take you shopping. If you're going to be living in Starfish Bay, you need to know that the weather stays hot and humid pretty much all the way through September. You're going to need some t-shirts and jeans. But don't worry about tomorrow, I'll just bring you a pair of my own that you can have. The jeans will probably be a little loose but the shirt should fit just fine, if not a little bit tight. Don't think I haven't noticed those guns that you're packing underneath that tax accountant get up you usually have going on.”

Castiel was glad that Dean couldn't see him blush at the compliments through the phone.

“I am very much looking forward to our outing, Dean. Thank you for inviting me.”

“Of course man, you're going to love it. Well, I should let you get some sleep, I know you just came off a long shift.”

Castiel looked at the clock on the cable box. 12:37 a.m. he couldn't help but wonder why Dean was up so late himself. But then it occurred to him, that Dean is a virile young man, and it is a Friday night. Perhaps it would do him best to not put too much stock into this invitation.

“Yes, I shall be heading to sleep soon, after I finish my tea. May I be so bold as to ask what you're doing up so late? Did you have a ‘hot date’?”

Dean laughed loudly, and the sound sent butterflies winging in Castiel's chest.

“Dude, I can tell you did the quotations even over the phone. And don't you think it would be a bit tacky for me to call you and ask you out on a date while I'm dating you  already?”

“So, we  _are_  dating?” Castiel questioned and for a second there was quiet.

“Well, I had certainly hoped so,” Dean said and Castiel could hear the nerves in his voice. “Was I too presumptuous?”

“No!” Castiel rushed to reassure him,”I was actually afraid that _I_ had been too presumptuous. I'm happy to find that I was not. But I am curious, were you just awake so you could call me? Because we could have talked about this on my break.”

“Naw, I didn't want to suck up all of your break time when I knew you'd be a wide awake at midnight. I was at my buddy Victor's house, for poker night. We usually alternate between my house, Benny's house, and Max's house. Lately it's just been between my house and Benny's house though because Max and Meg just had a baby, and cigar smoke and loud cursing does not bode well in the house with a newborn and someone with Meg's temper,” Dean sad, and Castiel could hear the fondness in his voice.

“Yes, I imagine that would not be conducive for new baby and mom to sleep.”

“Yeah, not really,” Dean said with a laugh. “So instead of 6:30, let's make it 6:00, that way you have time to change before we go. I'm really glad you said yes, Cas,” Dean said, almost shyly and again the butterflies danced.

“And I'm really glad that you asked me. Sleep well, Dean.”

“G’night, Cas.”

Castiel ended the call with a happy sigh. A fluttering of wings had him coming to attention abruptly.

“Cassie, Cassie, Cassie. What in the _hell_ are you doing?”

 


	7. Chapter 7

 

 

"Gabriel, you have to stop doing that. You can't just appear like that!  If I hadn't already finished my tea, it would no doubt be scalding my lap; my bare lap, as in case you hadn't noticed, I'm sitting here in my boxer shorts."

Gabriel just rolled his eyes and flung himself down in the chair across from the couch.

“Do you have any idea what the hell you're doing? Agreeing to go on a date with someone?”

Castiel narrowed his eyes menacingly. “How long were you eavesdropping for? Do you do that often? Come into my apartment and just listen to whoever I'm speaking with, and watch what I'm doing?”

“Don't be such a drama queen, Castiel. I'm supposed to look out for you, remember? Liaison?”

Now it was Castiel who rolled his eyes. “I'm pretty sure that's a self-made position, Gabriel. I highly doubt that father assigned you to me, when he decided to dole out this punishment.”

“Oh? And would you have rather have landed here with no help whatsoever?” Gabriel said, tone wounded and Castiel felt rightly chastised.

“I'm sorry, Gabriel. I did not mean to sound ungrateful, because I really do appreciate all that you have done for me since I landed. But what I do with Dean, is really no one's-”

“Wait, Dean? As in Dean Winchester? As in the reason why you were punished in the first place?”

Castiel pushed himself up from the couch, and began pacing the room. He tugged at his hair in frustration and looked at Gabriel.

“Gabriel, if you had seen his soul-”

“Cassie, I don't care if his soul is brighter than the Northern Lights. This is a bad idea. What are you going to do? What if he falls in love with you? Are you just going to disappear in a year and leave him broken hearted?”

Castiel growled in frustration.

“I don't know, okay? I don't know. When I was sent down here, I was given a choice. Live here for a year and then decide whether I want to go home. How can I legitimately make a decision like that, if all I do is sit alone in my apartment, and work at the gas station? How can I make an educated decision on whether or not I want to go back home to Heaven if I haven't really given Earth a chance?”

“Wait… you're serious? You're seriously giving this living on Earth thing a try, as a viable option for later on?”

Castiel whirled on him, “Why is that so hard for you to believe? You yourself live here on Earth, because you love it here. Why is it so hard to believe that I might love it here too?”

“Because I'm an archangel, Castiel. I'm not giving up my immortality to be here. I can leave whenever I want, there's no commitment. If you decide to stay, that's it. Kaput. It's done. There's no going back. Are you sure this Dean Winchester is worth all of that?”

Castiel sighed, and sank back down onto the couch burying his head in his hands. “I don't know, Gabriel. I really don't. But he might be. And if I'm going to be here, if I'm going to live here for a year, then I'm going to give it every chance it deserves, I'm going to give _myself_ every chance that I deserve to find happiness.”

“Alright, so answer me this. Say you stay here for the year, you find out that as much as you like Dean, he's just not worth you giving up your life in Heaven. What happens then? What happens to Dean? Do you really think he deserves to be used as some sort of experiment for you?”

Castiel glared at Gabriel, furiously. “Dean is not some experiment that I'm doing. Don't you think there is a reason why I broke the rules for him? Don't you think that perhaps I am meant to get to know him, that I am meant to be with him? Why else would I go against the most basic rule that we have, by stepping in and saving him? Why would I go against fate, and risk myself the way that I did, if I was not supposed to be in Dean Winchester's life?”

Gabriel didn't seem to have an answer for that, and for a few moments they just sat in uncomfortable silence.

“I'll modify his memory, if I have to. If I decide to return to the host, I will find a way to ease the pain for Dean.”

“I don't know Cassie, that sounds a little rapey to me, not gonna lie.”

“So what would you have me do?”

“For one, I wouldn't date him in the first place. But since that's not going to happen, then I think that you need to tell him the truth. Let him know what he's up against, and decide whether or not he wants to stay in the game.”

“You think I should tell Dean that I'm really an angel?”

“Yes. The guy deserves to know what he's up against,” Gabriel said, ”He deserves the right to decide whether or not he wants to risk his heart on something that might not work out. Don't you think?”

Castiel thought back to all the little opportunities he had in the past month-and-a-half to tell Dean the truth about where he came from. Each time he had chickened out, and Castiel didn't really think that was unreasonable of him. How do you tell someone something like that?

“What exactly am I supposed to say to him, Gabriel? _Hi_ _Dean_ , y _ou know_ _how_ _you_ _have_ _those_ _dreams_ _about_ _waking_ _up_ _in_ _pain_? _Well_ , _that's_ _because_ _I'm_ _an_ _angel_ _of_ _the_ _Lord_ _and_ _I_ _healed_ _all_ _of_ _your_ _wounds a split second after you were injured. And then, as a punishment, God sent me down here to live on earth for a year. Now I have to decide whether or not I want to go back home to Heaven's host when my year is up, or stay here with you. What do you think I should do?_ Oh yeah, I'm sure he wouldn't think I'm crazy at all.”

“Can the sarcasm, broseph. I'm sure there's a way you could prove it to him, your grace is just blocked not gone. You can still heal yourself. Hell, stick your hand in a pot of boiling water. That ought to show him that there's something special about you.”

Deep down Castiel knew that Gabriel was right. He was being selfish. It definitely wasn't fair to Dean, to have him become attached to someone who may or may not be here in a year. The least he could do was lay all of his cards out on the table, and let Dean decide what he wanted to do. Castiel's only worry was, that Dean would put him first, and not himself. Because self-sacrifice was something that rolled off of Dean like the waves upon the shore.

Castiel lifted his head and met Gabriel's tawny eyes head on.”You're right, of course. And I will endeavor to tell Dean as soon as I am able to. He does deserve to know, and he does deserve the chance to walk away if he doesn't want to have a relationship with me because of what I am and where I may go. I just need to figure out how.”

He would give himself tomorrow night. He would allow himself one evening free of axes about to fall. And then he would tell him. Somehow, he'd find a way to tell Dean what he really was, and what he needed to decide.

* * *

 

Dean hung up the phone with Cas and a feeling of anticipation settled over him. He worried he would not be able to get to sleep because he was so excited. He’d had to deal with all the teasing that came when you started dating someone new when he was at Victor's house. Not that he'd been spreading the word about Castiel to anyone. Dean could only assume that Ruby had said something to Meg and Meg had said something to Max and Max had said something to Victor and Benny and so on and so forth. The only one who hadn't given him any grief was Sam. Dean could only imagine it was because he was waiting for Dean to talk to him himself. So when they had pressed him, amongst the beer, nachos, and Five Card Stud, Dean had given in and admitted that yes, he was in fact dating a man named Castiel, and yes he did think that it could turn into something serious. For whatever reason though, he kept to himself the fact that Castiel was the one who had pushed him out of the way of the drunk driver. For some reason, that felt extra personal to him. Something that should just be between him and Cas, and up to _both_ him and Cas on whether or not the story should be told. He didn't know if it was because he kept dreaming of glowing blue eyes or the fact that Castiel somehow gave off an otherworldly aura that both was alien to him, and comforted him at the same time. All Dean knew was that he had never felt for anybody the way he felt for Castiel, and he was looking forward to exploring where it went. He could only hope that the man felt the same way about him. It was hard to tell with Castiel sometimes. His voice was always warm, and his eyes always looked at Dean with such a bare expression of affection. But he was still often quite reserved. While Dean had told Castiel about himself over their numerous dinnertime breaks together, about his family, the death of his his mother and what it had done to his father; about Sam and Ruby and little Evie, Dean still knew very little about Cas himself.

He knew that Cas had come to Starfish Bay because he had lost a job. What kind of job? That was anybody's guess. Dean knew that he lived with his brother, but he had yet to meet the man. He knew that Castiel came from up north, but he had no idea where, somehow that question had been avoided. With teasing and flirting, if he wasn't mistaken. It made Dean speculate on all sorts of things. Like, was Castiel on the run from some abusive relationship? Was he in the witness protection program? Or was he just a vagabond, who went from job to job and person-to-person, never really forming strong connections that would allow him to stay anywhere permanently? Dean was okay with waiting to find out. He was intrigued enough, and infatuated enough for sure, to wait until Castiel was ready to divulge some of those secrets. He could only hope that one day soon, Cas would find him trustworthy enough to be given some of those answers.

He knew that Castiel was a good person. The pureness just radiated out of him, and Dean would bet his life that he had never hurt another living soul purposefully, or without severe provocation. Dean wanted to unlock the secrets behind those stormy blue eyes, he wanted to be the one that Castiel went to with his joys and with his sorrows. Dean couldn't quite fathom how he'd gotten in so deep so quickly, but he knew from somewhere within, that it was all going to be worth it in the end.

Dean felt too keyed up to go to sleep right away, and he had nothing to do tomorrow before he went to pick up Castiel, aside from put together their picnic basket. There wasn't much to choose from on television at 1am, but he managed to find an _Everybody_ _Loves_ _Raymond_ block on TV Land, as he pulled out his phone. He opened the memo app and begin to make a list of things he would need to bring tomorrow. If he was going to do a picnic on the beach, then he was going to do it right. He wrote down the ingredients he would need for deep fried chicken, home made potato salad, and the makings of a cherry pie. He figured he could also hit up Walmart for one of those wicker baskets that were always seen in cheesy romantic movies. Something big enough to fit a small cooler on the inside, in which he would have a bottle of wine. He supposed something like scotch or whiskey would be more fitting for a movie like _Jaws_ , but this was a date. Actually, he should probably ask whether Castiel preferred beer over wine like Dean did. Or maybe something in between, like a hard cider or something. He would text him in the morning to find out.

Dean was so wired up still that he debated about whether or not to smoke a bowl from the small little stash he kept in his night side drawer, but he didn't want to waste it. That tended to be something he did on special occasions like Fourth of July or New Year's Eve.

Dean knew the quickest way to get himself to pass out would be a fast and dirty jerk off session, though he kind of felt weird about entertaining the idea. He didn't know why, it wasn't like Castiel probably didn't do the same thing when he had a hard time falling asleep. Or just in general because, hey, _guy_.

Dean turned off the TV, and made sure all of the doors were locked. He went to the bathroom to pee and brush his teeth, before returning to his bedroom where he kicked off his boots and stripped down to his boxer shorts. He turned the flat screen mounted on his bedroom wall on and set the sleep timer for an hour. Sometimes just having a little background noise helped, sometimes if he found something funny to watch he wouldn't have crazy dreams. Despite temptation, Dean bypassed his porn collection and settled on Food Network and a marathon of _Diners_ _Drive_ - _Ins_ _and_ _Dives,_  butwhen an hour passed, he was still awake.

Dean knew there was no reason to feel guilty about watching an erotic video, but the truth of the matter was, whenever he tried to think about one of the bombshells or hard bodied studs in his vast collection, the only face that came to mind was Castiel's. He felt kind of skeevy picturing the man he wanted to date and possibly have a future with, with his wide, pink chapped lips wrapped around his cock.

_And we have liftoff._

Dean couldn't stop himself as visions of Castiel _,_ naked _,_ and kneeling before him _,_ invaded his mind. Dean found himself grasping his dick loosely, as it plumped and lengthened in his hand. He tried not to think of Castiel's own hand gently stroking Dean’s member, his pink tongue darting out to lick at the head of Dean's leaking cock. He tried, and he failed. In his mind the fist he thrusted into was not his own, but Castiel's. The thumb that swept over the head of his cock was Castiel's thumb, and the bed sheets his hand gripped tightly were Castiel's dark chocolate trestles. Dean whimpered, quietly, as the Castiel in his mind slowly took him apart with firm strokes and teasing licks. Dean came on a heavy sigh, back arched, and spilling over his fist. As soon as his breathing was back to normal, he reached into his nightstand for the little package of wet wipes he he kept in there for just such an occasion. As he cleaned himself, he couldn't help but wondering and hoping that perhaps Castiel thought of him this way as well, that he wasn't the only one fighting back feelings of want and need. It had tested Dean self-control, the last few times they were together, for him not to reach out for even just a small, chaste kiss. Dean was waiting for the signal, he was waiting for Castiel to let him know that it was okay. Dean was perfectly fine with waiting. The best things often were ones that you had to work for. But as he drifted off to sleep, he couldn't help but hope that he would at least get a kiss goodnight.

* * *

 

 

Dean wound up sleeping till nearly 10 am. Dean threw on an _AC /DC_ t-shirt and a pair of cotton shorts. He would put on a pair of jeans before he left to pick up Castiel, because the beach got cool in the evening time. But for now it was hot and humid Saturday, and Dean wasn't too keen on sweating his balls off.

Dean made himself a cup of coffee from the expensive Keurig that Sam insisted on purchasing him, even though Dean had been happy with his old one. He poured himself a bowl of Cocoa Puffs and took out his phone to call his brother. Sam picked up on the third ring. When he answered he was out of breath.

“Dude, gross, I better not have interrupted you during sex. No, scratch that, you better not have _answered_ during sex,” Dean could practically see the classic bitch face through the phone.

“I was jogging, you jerk.”

“Yeah, yeah a likely story. Are you and Ruby coming down to the beach tonight?”

“Yes, we'll be there. Evie is having a  sleepover at Auntie Meg's house. It's been a big weekend for her actually, she had a sleepover at Kevin Tran's house just last night."

“Coed sleepovers already, Sammy? You like to live Dangerously.”

“Well, they are five,” Sam said in an amused tone, “so I'm pretty sure we have nothing to worry about. Why? Are you going? Did you want to sit with us? Because no offense, Dean, but Ruby and I were kind of hoping this would be our night out.”

“Relax, Sam, I don't want to infringe on your alone time with your wife. I was just wondering if you were going to be there, because I'm taking Castiel, and I thought it might be a nice relaxed setting to introduce you to him.”

Sam immediately perked up at that news. “Wow, really? We'd love to meet him, Dean! Anyone that has put that permanent smile on your face is definitely worth getting to know.”

Dean felt the little bit of nerves in his stomach settle down at that news. Sam definitely seemed genuinely happy for him, and he was excited for Castiel to meet his family. Maybe it would entice Castiel to allow him to meet his.

“Seriously, Dean, this is great. It's nice to see you doing something for yourself for once. You sound really happy and excited, and I don't think you've ever talked with this much affection about anyone you have ever dated before.”

Dean could feel his cheeks flushing, as he rubs the back of his neck.”Yeah he's just really... really great. He's shy, and insanely beautiful with these eyes that ... I don't even have words. He's kind of a dork, and he doesn't get any of my pop culture references, and he dresses like a tax accountant at all times. The tie, dress shirt, dress pants, the whole shebang. Even the goddamn blue Gas ‘n' Sip vest looks adorable on him.”

“So are you taking him to dinner first?”

Dean shook his head no, even though his brother couldn't see him through the phone.

“No, I'm going to pack a picnic. Fried chicken, potato salad, mom's cherry pie, you know, the works. I'm actually leaving in a little bit to run out to the store to grab everything I need to start cooking.”

“Mom’s cherry pie, huh? You're really breaking out the big guns. I don't think you have ever made that recipe for anyone who wasn't family. Are you sure you're not already in love with this guy?” Sammy teased and Dean laughed nervously, because honestly? No, he wasn't quite sure whether or not he was already in love with Castiel. Dean never used to believe in love at first sight, but considering he hadn't been able to stop thinking about the man's impossibly blue eyes since the moment he saved his life, Dean definitely thought it was a real possibility now.


	8. Chapter 8

 

 

For the first time since he started, Castiel woke up looking forward to going to work. Not that he was averse to work in general. He found great dignity and what he did. Working and serving his fellow man, had given him a newfound respect for what humans had to go on a day-to-day basis; the often monotonous nine to five, or in his case twelve to twelve, the daily grind just to make sure they have the necessities that they need. The fact that it was after work, that humans really got a chance to play, spend time with their families, or do anything for themselves. Observing from afar just wasn't the same, and he would carry this new found respect with him for all of his days.

The town seem to be abuzz with a happy energy, and he had a feeling it had to do with the night's festivities. After talking to a few customers, he learned that this was one of the most looked forward to times of the summer in Starfish Bay. It was why August was generally the biggest tourist month in the town. In August, he learned it was next to impossible to find an empty hotel, or campground where there was room. People booked months in advance to make sure they had a place to stay when they came to visit the seaside town.

The store was a flurry of activity that morning, people in and out continuously, the bell dinging constantly, creating its own concert. The first things that sold out were the sparklers, the glow sticks, and the bug spray. Scores of teenagers were in and out, as well as families picking up candy, drinks, and those styrofoam coolers that you could throw away when you were done with them. Castiel kind of felt bad for Frank, the man who worked on Saturday nights. When he mentioned so to Nora, she just laughed and said not to worry about it. Frank Devereaux was not one for big crowds, he would much rather be in the quiet store. Castiel wound up staying an hour later to help out, because it had been so busy. By the time he got out of work he was starving, but he didn't want to ruin his appetite for whatever dinner Dean had planned. So instead he satisfied himself with a sleeve of peanut butter crackers, and a 12 oz bottle of orange juice that he bought with his store discount. As he was leaving, he realized he had missed a text from Dean.

_10:47 am: From Dean: hey blue eyes, you feel like wine, beer, or hard cider?_

Castiel looked at the store clock. 1:30. He blew out a breath, frustrated that he had missed the message and hoped that Dean did not think he was ignoring him. He waved goodbye to Nora, who would be at the store until 5pm when Frank came in to relieve her, and headed outside. Castiel walked over to what he now considered his bench. He pulled out his phone and tapped out a quick message to Dean.

_1:33 pm From You: I am so sorry Dean, please forgive me. I just now received your message. It has been extremely busy in the store, and I stayed an extra hour to help Nora out. I have no preference as I have had neither wine, beer, nor hard cider. I trust you to make the decision please._

Castiel leaned back on the bench and closed his eyes. The warm breeze ruffled his hair, and he didn't even mind the thin coating of sweat he felt across his brow, because he was in such a good mood. The sun actually felt pleasurable baking on his skin, despite the long sleeves, and the stickiness. He was giving himself a few minutes in case Dean messaged him back, and then he would head home and take a shower and probably pace nervously until Dean arrived to pick him up.

The phone jumped in his hand when it buzzed, startling a soft laugh out of himself.

_1:37 pm From Dean: no worries, I figured as much. This is one of the busiest days of the summer. But Crowley and the boys get such a kick out of it, kind of makes them feel like kings of the town, you know?_

Before Castiel even finish reading the first message the phone buzzed again

. _1:38 pm From Dean: how the hell have you never had alcohol before? Dude, are you a Jehovah's Witness? You could have told me, I don't judge._

Castiel laughed out loud, not caring if people walking by saw him shaking with mirth _._

_1:41 pm From You: no, Dean, I am most definitely not a Jehovah's Witness. I have just never had the opportunity to try an alcoholic beverage. In case you hadn't noticed, my people skills are rusty. I am not one for hanging out in crowds, or with anyone besides my brother, really. And he is more of a candy and chocolate milk kind of guy then a beer kind of guy._

Castiel watched as a couple of the novelty shops across the street- a screen shop, a smoke shop, and a Chinese takeout place- we're all putting signs in their windows. _Closing_ _early_ , the one in the Chinese food restaurant’s window said, and  _closing_ _at_ _5pm_ , the screen shop said. The owner of the smoke shop seem to have a sense of humor though, because his sign said _Closing_ _early_. _Shark_ _attack_.

_1:44 pm From Dean: that's cool, man. How about I pack us a variety pack and you can see what you like?_

Castiel smiled at Dean's thoughtfulness, as he replied back.

_1:45 pm From You: that sounds wonderful, Dean. I am so looking forward to this evening. See you at 6?_

Castiel stood up from the bench, and stretched his arms up to the sky, feeling a pop in his back.

_1:47 pm From Dean: Yes. Can’t wait Cas._

Castiel walked back home with what he was sure was a dopey grin. Dean made him feel... well, that was it, wasn't it? Dean made him feel. Observing was so much more limited than living. The truth was, no matter how all of this ended up, Castiel no longer felt any anger towards his father or his choice in punishment. He was considering it a gift. To finally really see what it was like to be like one of his father's favorite creations.

When Castiel arrived back at his apartment, he gathered all but the clothes he was wearing and his bed and bathroom linens. He brought them downstairs to the laundry room in the basement level. He knew that Dean was bringing him appropriate clothing, but Castiel needed to shower, and he couldn't very well answer the door naked.

By the time his clothes were finished and he had written a shopping list for the week, it was still only 4 pm. Dean wouldn't be coming for two more hours. Castiel decided that before he took his shower he would attempt to meditate. Castiel stripped down until he was nude and sat cross-legged on his bed. Before he began, he sent up a prayer.

_Father. I know this may not have been your intention. In fact, I'm sure it wasn't. But my time here on Earth, interacting with humans... It has been wonderful. If you expected me to regret what I did, to regret for even a second, saving Dean Winchester, then I am afraid you are doomed for disappointment. I could never. His soul shines brighter than any star, brighter than our glorious sun. He is a good man. A man who was given tasks far beyond his age and excelled. He is an exceptional brother, teacher and friend. In all honesty, more than a friend. I actually, uh, have a date with him tonight. Going on dates. It's what humans do, right? I'm going to tell him. I have to. I have to give him the choice. I have to give him the choice on whether we continue with the possibility that I may leave in the end, never to return. I say possibility because in the beginning, I would not have hesitated to tell you, yes Father, please let me return to the host. But that has changed. Now I am unsure. Dean makes me unsure._

Castiel could think of nothing he wanted to add, and began to focus on his breathing. He blocked out all noises and blanked out his mind. All that could be heard by him now was his dormant drumming of power. It itched under his skin, restless from disuse, but there was nothing he could do. At most, he could heal some small wounds, which he had had to do at work. Mostly thanks to box cutters and stubborn cardboard boxes.

Castiel relaxed his muscles one by one starting with the tips of his toes all the way out to the tips of his fingers. By the time he was done, Castiel felt loose limbered and a little sleepy. He also felt lighter after his prayer to God. He may not have told Dean the truth yet, but his conscience with his father was clear.

When Castiel got up, he looked at the clock on the television. It was quarter past five. Castiel started the shower, bringing a fresh pair of boxer shorts and socks into the bathroom. Castiel stepped under the hot spray inside. He did enjoy showers. He loved the way it sluiced down his body, how refreshing it felt to wash the sweat of the day off of his skin. Castiel washed his hair with shampoo that smelled of coconut and lime and he was reminded of the beach. He soaked up his body with a bar of Irish Spring, ignoring the lengthening of his penis. Part of him wanted to take care of it right now, but what he had discovered over the last few weeks, was that if he waited until he was in bed where he could picture Dean and all of the things that he liked about him, the arousal and resulting climax was much more pleasurable. Castiel didn't quite know the proper etiquette of masturbating to thoughts of the friend whose life you saved, and were now kind of dating. When he tried asking Gabriel, his brother nearly aspirated his lollipop because he had laughed so hard. He thought about asking Dean if he too, masturbated to the thought of Castiel, but had a feeling that the question may cross some sort of boundary line.

Castiel finished washing and stepped out of the shower. He wrapped a towel around himself and used another to vigorously dry his hair. Before he could grab a comb to try and tame his unruly locks, he heard the doorbell ring.

Castiel panicked. He wasn't even dressed. He hitched the towel tighter around his waist in padded out into his living room. A glance at the clock showed that it was nearly six, and that Castiel had once again lost track of time in his musings.

Castiel opened the door to find Dean, holding a plastic bag, wearing jeans and a t-shirt that had the letters AC/DC on them and for a second he wondered what that stood for. That was until his eyes met Dean's. Dean was gazing at Castiel with what could only be considered a hungry expression, moss green irises wide. His mouth hung open and it looked like he was struggling for words. Castiel felt a tug of what he now knew was lust, start a fire in his belly. When he spoke, Castiel's voice was even grittier than usual.

“Hello, Dean.”

Dean let out a whoosh of air, and it became apparent that he'd been holding his breath. Dean shook his head and laughed breathlessly.

“Heya, Cas.” Dean thrust the plastic bag into Castiel's arms. “Go put these on before you kill me, okay?”


	9. Chapter 9

 

 

It had been a busy day for Dean. Walmart had been hell, because it seemed like everyone had the same idea that he did. But he did manage to find one nice picnic basket that he was able to fit a soft gel cooler inside of. He went to the liquor store, and got a six pack of strawberry wine coolers, a six pack of Angry Orchard, and a six pack of Yuengling. He took two of each drink, and combined them into one six-pack container. That went inside of the cooler. Dean proceeded to spend the rest of his afternoon perfectly frying chicken, the way that Missouri had once showed him how. When Sam and Dean were kids, Missouri always knew when Dean was tight on funds, and when John used the grocery money for alcohol. On those days, she would show up with homemade meatloaf or fried chicken. When Dean was seventeen, he had her show him step-by-step how to make it. The entire time he was cooking, Dean had been tempted to eat some of the spoils. Dean managed to refrain by telling himself that he couldn't wait to see the look on Castiel's face when he took that first bite.

Dean threw together a potato salad, made of red russet potatoes, sliced boiled egg, paprika, celery salt, mayonnaise, salt, pepper, and mustard. Dean was pretty proud to say that his potato salad was always the first thing to go at the end of the school year cookout that the Little Red Schoolhouse always had.

Instead of making one big cherry pie, Dean had bought mini pie tins for individual pies. He would freeze the rest for future desserts. Visions of late night online gaming entered his mind, headphones on talking to Charlie as they kicked ass in the Moondoor Chronicles. Better yet, for more movie dates with Castiel.

With everything baked and fried, and packed up to go, the last thing on Dean's list was to pick out an outfit for Castiel. Dean dug into his bottom drawer and pulled out a pair of dark blue jeans that looked new. He thought that they were from Ruby, but he couldn't be sure. All he knew was that they were a little bit tight around his pudge in the middle. Dean unconsciously rubbed at his belly. Maybe he _should_ cut back on the pies, he thought to himself, sheepishly. But not today. Dean went into his closet to get one of his t-shirts off the hanger. Dean wasn't some crazy person who hung up every shirt he owned and ironed everything, but his band tees and his novelty tees he liked to keep in good condition. Dean fingered through the hangers until he came across a brown _Louden Swain_ t-shirt that broadcasted the album name, _Eskimo_.

Dean carefully folded the clothing, and put them into one of the plastic Walmart shopping bags. Then he grabbed his phone, the picnic basket, and the bag of clothing and brought them out into the Impala. He was leaving a little bit early, but he knew from experience that traffic would be busy. Lots of people closed down their businesses, or left work early, so that they could get a good spot on the beach. Dean put on his aviators and got behind the wheel of his Baby. He had been right about the traffic, Dean discovered the closer he got to Main Street. At this rate, it was lucky he did because he would be arriving at just about 6pm. If he had left at 5:30 like he planned, he would no doubt have been late. As Dean sat in the stop and go traffic, he could smell steaks grilling, and hamburgers and hot dogs. It was such a summer smell, grilled foods mixed with ocean breeze and sunblock.

The movie wouldn't start until around 9pm but the beach would be crowded long before that. People like Dean and Castiel, who would be enjoying a picnic dinner, other people who would set up their hibachi grills, and bonfires for toasting marshmallows for s'mores and jiffy pop. It was like a beach party every Saturday night.

It would be light enough for Castiel to see the setup. An eighteen foot inflatable movie screen, from Busy Bee Bouncers would be anchored between two of Fergus Crowley Macleod’s sailboats on the water. One of them manned by Crowley’s brother Mick and the other one, by Crowley himself and his best friend Arthur. It was a very cool thing to see, and they all seemed to really enjoy doing it. As the owner of Busy Bee Bouncers, Crowley enjoyed free advertising, and got to be mister summer fun guy. Hannah was always joking about it at school. How her husband would get so excited the closer it came to June. Busy Bee Bouncers Twitter page would put out polls on which movies they'd like to see for the remaining weeks of the summer. Jaws, of course, was the first one they showed every year. Dean hadn't participated in the polls this year, so he didn't really know what other ones to look forward to.

Dean pulled up to Castiel's apartment complex at five minutes until six. He remembered that Cas had said he lived on the 3rd floor. Dean jogged up the three flights of stairs as there was no elevator. Castiel was apartment seven and Dean knocked on the door.

When Castiel answered in nothing but a towel, and a panicked look on his face, Dean nearly swallowed his tongue. His eyes were drawn at first to the messy, damp hair and he had to fight like hell to keep his fingers to himself. Castiel’s skin was still glistening and a stray drop of water was trailing it’s way down his stubbled cheek, down his neck, rolling down Cas’ chest to land next to a deliciously perfect little black freckle next to his right nipple. It took Dean a minute to realize that Castiel had spoken to him.

“Hello, Dean.”

That sexy as fuck whiskey-soaked voice was even darker, like liquid smoke and Dean had to fight back a groan.

“Heya, Cas.” He managed to choke out before he all but shoved his bag of clothing at Cas. “Go put these on before you kill me, okay?”

Castiel nodded and hurried back into the bedroom. While Castiel was getting dressed, Dean surveyed the space. It was a typical studio apartment. One big room where Castiel’s futon sat, folded up for now, but Dean could see sheets poking out of it. He also had a broken in navy recliner. The tv sat across from the futon on a small entertainment center, with a dvd player on the second shelf. The only dvd he saw there was _Earth:The Blue Planet._ To the right of the door was was a half wall that housed the small kitchen and table obviously only made for two. There was a window over the sink, and a window on the wall on either side of the television set.

“Hey Cas?” Dean called out as the man was changing.

“Yes, Dean?” came the muffled reply.

“I thought your brother lived here too? Where the hell does he sleep?”

“He’s actually not here all that much. Gabriel is kind of a free spirit. He tends to go wherever the mood or latest love interest takes him.”

Dean heard the bathroom door snick open and couldn’t hold back the groan as Castiel emerged. Sex hair somewhat tamed, but still delectably distracting, _Louden Swain_ t-shirt just on the right side of too tight, and arms with biceps that Dean literally wanted to suck marks into. The jeans, they were just loose enough to catch on hip bones that looked sharp enough to cut glass. Dean gave Cas what could only be described as an eye-fuck.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Cas,” was all he managed to say.

“Don’t blaspheme, Dean,” Castiel said sternly, but ruined it when he broke out in a nose crinkling smile.


	10. Chapter 10

Castiel felt a heat pool in his belly at the hungry way Dean was looking at him. It was the only accurate way he could describe it. The glint in Dean's green eyes was unmistakably amorous and it made Castiel's heart trip and his knees tremble. He hoped Dean didn't notice.

Dean, Castiel thought, looked very appealing himself. His tanned, freckled skin was on display in his t-shirt and Castiel decided he really liked the way Dean's form fitting jeans emphasized his strong bowed legs.

Castiel was unable to move for a moment as he was once again, overwhelmed with a melting pot of feelings and sensations. When it came to Dean, sometimes it was as though he didn't know where to look. He likened it to gazing at the Sun; If he stared too long, his whole focus zeroed-down solely to this one man.

“Do you have a sweater?” Dean's voice was low and tinged with fond amusement. “It can get chilly on the beach at night.”

Castiel thought for a moment before going to the closet to pull out his trench coat and Dean laughed softly.

“Never mind. I have an extra sweatshirt in my Baby. Now tell me,” Dean waggled his brows menacingly “are you ready to never want to step in the ocean again?”

Castiel had to laugh. “As I have never been in the ocean before anyway, I fear tonight's events will have little impact.”

“You've never been in the ocean? What, are there no beaches where you're from?” Dean asked, and Castiel could tell he was fishing for information.

“Not as such,” he evaded. Castiel knew he was being selfish, but he wanted this one night. Castiel grabbed his keys off of the kitchen counter so he could lock up behind himself and Dean.

He followed his friend out to his car, smiling in appreciation at the obvious care Dean took with her. Castiel imagine that Dean took care of everything important in his life that way.

Castiel found himself blushing as Dean rushed over to open the passenger side door with a wink and a devastating smile. He slid into the car and was enveloped by the scent of Dean, a heady combination of leather, woodsmoke and... apples. A glance in the backseat showed a thick Star Wars comforter and two hoodie sweatshirts, both in red. Dean followed his gaze and looked over at Castiel with a grin.

“If you're wondering about food, I have a picnic basket packed in the trunk. I didn't want to be distracted by the smell,” Dean laughed as he started the car. He reached up into his visor and pull down a pair of black sunglasses. Castiel didn't like how they obscured his view of Dean's expressive green eyes.

They didn't have far to travel, but the ride was pleasant nonetheless. Dean had the radio on low, and his fingers drummed a quick beat on his steering wheel. They both had their windows rolled down, and Castiel let his hand hang out of the side. He enjoyed how it felt when he held his palm out, wind smacking against his hand, pushing it back. He missed the feeling of wind, the undercurrent beneath his wings as he flew to wherever he needed to be. The salty breeze washed over Castiel's face and blew his perpetually messy hair about. Dean pulled into the back of the beach parking lot, which was already more than half full.

“You weren't kidding when you said it would be busy,” Castiel looked around as people unpacked their cars in the late afternoon sun. Couples both young and old, with clasped hands made their way towards the boardwalk toting blankets and beach chairs. There were big groups and small groups with coolers. Some people were grilling right in the parking lot and the smell of hot dogs and hamburgers mingled with the sharp smell of sunscreen and bug spray. The general atmosphere was jovial. Castiel couldn't help but to be charmed.

When they got out of the car, Dean reached into the backseat to grab the blanket and sweatshirts. He passed them over to Castiel to hold for a moment while Dean opened the Impala’s large trunk. Cas was assaulted with the delicious smell of fried chicken.

“Dean... that smells incredible,” Castiel said with an unconscious lick of his lips. Dean's eyes followed the movement of Castiel's tongue and he felt warm inside when Dean winked at him.

“Wait till you taste it.”

Castiel's curiosity won out and he tried to sneak a peek inside of the basket, but Dean batted his hands away. Castiel looked up at Dean, lips turned up in a half-smile and the man sighed heavily.

“It should be illegal for anyone to be that adorable,” Dean said with affection, only making Castiel smile wider. Dean reach out with his free hand to tangle his fingers with Cas’.

“This okay?” Dean asked, gently swinging their laced digits.

“Very okay,” Castiel replied softly and Dean's face lit up with his charming smile. Dean tugged Cas’ hand, and he adjusted the blanket and sweatshirts under his other arm as they walked along.

“I thought there would be more children here,” Castiel remarked, as they passed a vendor cart selling glow stick necklaces. He grinned as Dean stopped to buy two, one of which he looped over Cas’ neck, before pulling another over his own head.

“They'll be plenty of kids on the beach, you'll see. Most of the little ones go home by 7 or 8 pm though. Babysitters are a hot commodity on movie night,” Dean said with a laugh. “Sam and Ruby are lucky because Ruby’s sister Meg, the one who had a baby a few months back, is spoiling my niece Evie with some baby cousin time.”

“She is having a sleepover?” Castiel asked.

“Yeah, better at Auntie Meg's then Uncle Bobby's. I never want to see that old bastard in a tiara and makeup again.”

Castiel couldn't keep the censure out of his voice when he asked, “Do you have an issue with people not conforming to gender norms?”

Instead of being offended, Dean laughed.

“Fuck, no. You're talking to someone who has been known to slip on a pair of lace panties when the mood strikes,” Dean said it so casually and Castiel felt his mouth go dry at the image it inspired in his head. “And I'm all for guy liner and silk. Hell Magnus Bane is hot as fuck. It's just that Bobby was mortified. But he'd do anything for Evie, and that little squirt knows it.”

Castiel had no idea who Magnus Bane was, but hearing curse words fall out of such a pure soul’s mouth was doing strange things to him… he wondered if there was such a thing as a bad language kink. Castiel followed Dean to the end of the boardwalk and stepped onto the sand, wishing he had sneakers instead of his loafers. Sand snuck in with every step. Castiel sucked in a breath when he saw where Dean was headed. Dean was stopping at the very spot that he had landed. The sandy dunes surrounded by seagrass with the gorgeous view of the ocean. Castiel trekked over to him, too speechless to say anything as Dean worked to get the blanket out from under Cas’ arms. The taller man spread it out in front of a wide boulder.

“Are you okay?” Dean's voice was concerned as Castiel just managed to catch the sweatshirts from tumbling to the sand. Castiel swallowed and nodded.

Dean used the large picnic basket to anchor one end of the blanket, and hunted around for some large rocks to put at the rest of the corners.

“I know it's a bit far up,” Dean said as he straightened, but it's out of the foot traffic, and we can still see and hear everything. It's my favorite spot on the beach. Wait till sunset.”

Castiel peered at Dean. “Do you bring all of your dates here?” Castiel teased, and was surprised to see Dean flush. He rubbed the back of his neck but looked at Castiel steadily, despite his embarrassment.

“Never brought a date here before, Cas. Just you.”

Castiel found himself unconsciously moving into Dean's orbit. He felt a callused palm cup his cheek. At the question in Dean’s eyes, Castiel gave a little nod of assent. The whole world narrowed down to this one moment. There was a roaring in Castiel's head that could have been the waves on the shore or just his brain short-circuiting as Dean's lips met his own for the first time. The sweatshirts fell to the blanket as Castiel's hands came up to grip at Dean's waist, the material of his t-shirt soft against Cas’ fingertips.

It was a gentle slide of lips as they moved together. Their mouths parted and clung, the press of flesh shallow yet extremely intimate. Castiel sighed into the kiss as Dean changed the angle slightly to better slot their lips together.

Castiel's senses were full of Dean, woodsmoke and Apple, and his gentle touch. Castiel no longer felt the sand in his shoes or the hot sun at his back. He gasped as the tip of Dean's tongue darted out to brush the seam of his lips. He felt Dean start to pull away and Castiel gripped his waist harder to stop him. Cas tentatively licked into Dean's mouth and nearly purred as their tongues undulated against each other. Castiel had no idea how long they stood there on the blanket, lost in each other, but when they broke apart, Castiel was light-headed. Dean rested his forehead against Cas’, eyes still closed.

“Wow,” Dean breathed out and Cas _hmm’d_ in agreement. A not-so-subtle cough behind them had Castiel's face heating up and Dean's eyes opening quickly.

Castiel was startled to see a couple beaming at him and Dean from behind them. A man, at least six four, with long brown hair and kind eyes stood next to a woman, shorter, slender, with long dark hair and a mischievous sparkle in her gaze.

“Damn, Dean. Your babbling was warranted. He's hot.” the woman said and Castiel's brows winged up in surprised. The man next to her rolled his eyes.

“Jeez, Ruby, at least say hi before you embarrass them both,” the man reached out a hand towards Castiel and gripped it, firmly. “Hi there, you must be Castiel. I'm Sam, Dean's brother. And this is my oh so subtle wife, Ruby.”

“Oh, shut up Sam. Does he look offended to you? Are you offended?” Castiel shifted his gaze to Dean, who instead of annoyance, wore an expression of fond amusement.

“No, I am not offended. I'm flattered you find my appearance pleasing,” Castiel said quietly, and Dean laughed, wrapping his arm around him from behind. Castiel found himself leaning back into the warmth, enjoying the way they fit together.

“So, you're new to the area, how do you like it so far, Cas?”

It was odd, hearing the nickname Dean coined for him on someone else's lips, but not bad. Sam was friendly and open and Castiel imagined he'd been a curious child.

“I find it... charming. It reminds me of the small seaside towns in the teen dramas that my brother Gabriel insists that I watch.”

He felt Dean's breath on his neck as he snorted out a laugh behind him. “What, like Gilmore Girls?”

“Yes, and something called Dawson's Creek.”

Castiel felt Dean's body shake with what he assumed was laughter, his face buried against Castiel shoulder blade.

“Well, we hope you like it enough to stay,” Ruby said brightly with a wink aimed at Dean. “We're going to go watch Crowley and the boys set up, you want to come?”

“Actually, I haven't eaten and neither has Cas, so I think this time we will pass. I'll give him the nickel tour next week,” Dean peeked over Cas' shoulder, brow raised. “That okay with you?”

“That is perfectly acceptable, Dean, thank you for asking.” Dean watched him with an expression that could not be mistaken for anything other than unadulterated affection. It made Castiel's breath catch. What an exquisite ache having this man look at him so, caused in Cas’ heart. Castiel was once again reminded why it was that angels chose to fall.

After saying their goodbyes to Sam and Ruby, Dean began unpacking the picnic basket. Soon the blanket was covered in a feast of fried chicken, potato salad and what Dean proudly proclaimed was his mother's cherry pie.

“I wasn't sure what you'd like to drink, so I brought a variety.” Dean said with a grin, lifting out a six pack housing a mix of wine, beer and cider. ”I also brought water, if you wind up not liking alcohol.”

Castiel arranged himself across from Dean on the blanket, choosing not to let his lack of experience in all things alcohol-related stop him, and reached for the cider because the apple flavor reminded him of Dean's enticing scent.

They sat in companionable silence as Dean dished up their meal. He handed Castiel a paper plate with fried chicken and potato salad with a plastic fork speared through a slice of hard boiled egg. Castiel couldn’t hold back the groan of appreciation as he bit into golden crispy chicken skin.

Dean grinned at him a pleased expression on his face. “That sounded like a good noise,” he said. “I did good?”

Castiel could only nod over a mouthful of food. “So good,” he managed to say. “Did you take a cooking class?” Castiel asked after swallowing down his bit with a swig of his hard cider, which he decided was delicious, tart but refreshing.

Dean laughed. “No. Well, you know how I took care of Sam a lot. My boss, Missouri, she taught me how to make the chicken and then kind of got me hooked on all of those cooking shows. With Mom gone… and Dad’s PTSD, it was kind of up to me to make sure Sammy got fed. And Kids can be real picky. I learned to be creative because of those shows.”

Castiel found himself lacing his fingers with Dean’s and squeezing the digits gently. He didn’t say he was sorry because he had a feeling that Dean would take it as pity, and Castiel did not pity Dean; he admired him, was in awe of him and had the utmost respect for him, but never pity.

“Well, you paid attention to your lessons, because this is excellent.”

As they continued to eat, Dean pointed out people walking along the shore in wetsuits, carrying inner tubes.

“What are they doing?” Castiel asked.

“Those brave souls are going to watch from the water. Sam tried it once,” Dean reminisced with a chuckle. “He was like, seventeen? He made it until the first shark attack and then bailed.”

Dean pointed out the two sailboats anchored in the shallows.  Two large ropes or cords of some kind attached to an inflatable screen that stood up in the water, creating a triangle. Midway point between the two was a small rowboat.

“Is that where the projector will be?” Castiel asked, pointing out at the set up.

Dean, who had finished packing up the food, both of them deciding to wait on pie, shimmied himself backward until his back was braced against the large slab of beach rock.

“Yep,” he said, as he patted the space beside him. Castiel settled in next to Dean, the skin of his bare arm prickling as it brushed against Dean’s. “It’s already set up to go, it’s just hard to see from here.”

As the sun began to set, Dean and Cas sat huddled together. Castiel smiled as Dean casually locked their fingers together. Castiel turned to look at him and found himself lost in a forest of green. The sound of the beach goers seemed to be muted, and the smell from the crackling bonfires permeated the air. Castiel found himself laying his head on Dean’s shoulder, closing his eyes and savouring the moment.

When a small little body flopped on their blanket, Castiel yelped. A little dark haired head lifted up and bright almond shaped eyes and a gap toothed smile shone up at Dean and Castiel.

“Hi, Mr. Winchester!” came an exuberant voice and Dean huffed out a laugh.

“Hey, Kevin. Does your mom know where you are?”

“No,” the little boy said matter of factly. “Is this your boyfriend?”

Castiel, who had picked up his Angry Orchard, choked on the sip he had just taken. Dean rubbed his back gently while he answered the child in a staged whisper.

“I’m working on it. Where’s your mom, Kev? You know she is probably freaking out.” Dean chastised, but Castiel was still stuck on the fact that Dean was apparently working on becoming his boyfriend. He found himself unable to hold back a wide smile.

“She’s around here somewhere,” Kevin’s eyes darted around the beach, before lighting on Castiel. “How long does Mr. Winchester hafta work on it?” the boy asked him, with adorably raised brows.

Castiel cleared his throat and spoke in a grave voice. “Well… I think if he shares his pie with me, that would be a really good start.”

“You gots any pie, Mr. Winchester?”

Dean shook his head as though exasperated. “Kevin. Be serious. I _always_ have pie.”

“Kevin Tran! You better run that little fanny back here right now!” The shrill cry came from a petite Asian woman calling from the boardwalk.

“He’s over here, Linda,” Dean called out and Castiel saw relief flash on the womans face as she hurried over. Dean didn’t let go of his hand as the mom of who Castiel could only assume was one of Dean’s students stopped in front of them.

“Sorry Dean, you know The Flash over here,” Linda said with a suffering smile. “I hope he didn’t intrude too much on your date.”

“Nah, it’s fine. Cas, this is Linda and Kevin Tran. Kevin is in my class.”

“I gathered,” Castiel said with a smile, “Lovely to meet you.”

Over the next hour or so, more of Dean’s friends, students and parents came by. The teacher introduced him with ease. Castiel was surprised there weren’t any raised brows by anyone at Dean dating a man.

“New England,” Dean explained when Cas brought it up. “It’s just a little more liberal here. There is always some dicks, dont get me wrong. I had my fair share of bullies in high school, but for the most part, no one around here really cares,” Dean said, passing Cas a strawberry wine cooler.

Cas twisted the cap and took a long pull. His face scrunched up at the taste and Dean laughed.

“Too sweet?”

“I don’t know,” Cas said and took another sip. It made his cheeks tingle. “It _is_ sweet, but I think I like it.”

Dean leaned into his space, eyes questioning, and Cas angled towards him. Taking that as permission, Dean caught Cas’ lips in a soft kiss, tongue lightly dipping into his mouth in a gentle slide.

“It is definitely sweet,” Dean murmured as the broke apart and Castiel could feel himself blushing.

As the sky grew darker, they stretched their legs and took a trip up to the restrooms up in the parking area. Castiel was delighted to see their glow stick necklaces at work, much to Dean’s amusement.

Castiel noticed more and more children filtering out with their caretakers, and more adults piling in. He definitely understood now why Dean had wanted to get here early. It was getting crowded. Peals of laughter could be heard, as well as general chatter. As they walked down the boardwalk, back to the blanket, the sugary scent of toasted marshmallows carried on the breeze. Another gust brought with it the smell of buttery popcorn.

“Jiffy Pop," Dean said with a smile, nodding down towards one of the bonfires with beach goers holding the movie treat over the flame for popping. When they settled back down on the blanket, Dean opened the basket to pull out two mini pies and plastic forks. Dean leaned back against the rock and to Castiel’s delight, tugged him between his legs to rest against his chest. Silently, they ate cherry pie as the sky turned inky and filled with stars.

“Is this a good real first date?” Dean whispered against his ear.

Castiel angled his head on Dean’s shoulder, so he could see Dean’s beautiful face.

“It’s my _only_  real first date, since we aren't counting our many dinner breaks, but so far easily the most fun I have ever had.”  Dean’s face showed shock for a moment before settling into a fond expression.

“So, no pressure then, huh?” Dean teased, his lips a hairsbreadth from Castiel’s.

“None,” Cas sighed, his eyes slipping closed as their mouths met for the third time that night. The sweet flavor of cherry and strawberry wine burst and saturated his taste buds as their tongues entwined. Cas shifted until he was practically sideways in Dean’s lap, arms winding around his waist while Dean gripped his arm with one hand, the other cupping the back of Cas’ head. Castiel clutched at the back of Dean’s shirt, as they panted against each others lips, breathless, before diving back in for another deep kiss. The crowd cheering brought them back to awareness, their mouths parting slowly.

“Woah,” Dean said as Castiel licked his lips, as though chasing the taste of Dean.

“What?” he asked, voice hoarse. Dean was staring at him, a wondrous look in his eyes. His hand came up and he thumbed Castiel’s cheekbone.

“I swear, for a second your eyes were glowing.”

Castiel’s breath hitched at the words. Dean leaned his forehead against Cas’ and huffed out a laugh. “You magic, Cas?”

Castiel pushed down the surge of guilt and tried to shrug, casually.

“Maybe.”

Dean laughed again. He shifted Cas so the angel was back leaning against Dean’s chest. “Alright, bright eyes, shows starting.”

* * *

 

 

Castiel was thoroughly engaged in the film. He found parts of it humorous, and although he knew logically that the great white shark was not real, it was still rather creepy. He enjoyed how the ominous music put him in a frame of mind to be scared; and wasn’t that interesting. Choosing to be scared on purpose. Humans were fascinating.

There was one moment during the showing that was entertaining and had nothing at all to do with the film. Whilst Quint, Brody and Hooper were singing _Show me the way to go home_ there was a blood curdling scream, followed by raucous cursing and a inner tube being flipped over. Apparently some genius thought it would be smart to slip into the water behind his girlfriend and grab her ankle just as the shark started breaking the side of the boat. Said girlfriend turned out to be one of Dean’s childhood best friends.

Needless to say, she made sure the whole beach knew, by screaming at him.

_“Cole Trenton, you are an utter piece of shit. I am so done with you. Grow the fuck up!”_

_Dean laughed, yelling “Good for you, Jo! Bout time you dropped his lame ass!”_

_“Hey, fuck you, Winchester!”_

_“In your dreams, Trenton.”_

 

“Dude has cheated on her so many times, and she keeps taking him back. I hope she lets him go for good this time,” Dean said, as they packed up to go home. Castiel clutched the unused sweatshirts and the blanket to his chest as Dean picked up the picnic basket. He hadn’t needed the extra clothes, not when he had been wrapped in strong arms.

Despite knowing that eventually he would have to tell Dean the truth about what he was, Castiel wouldn’t have traded this night for anything. It had been perfect, more than he could have dreamed. He was sad the night was almost over, but it was nearly midnight and Cas had caught himself yawning more than once.

Dean tangled the fingers of his free hand with Cas’ as they made the trek back to the Impala. Like a gentleman, Dean opened Cas’ door for him before going to the drivers side and sliding in. Dean sat back and sighed, and Castiel found himself studying the man next to him. He appeared relaxed, if a little tired, and he was looking at Castiel as though he was someone he wanted to keep.

“I really wish the night wasn’t over. But I know you are tired.”

“No I’m not,” Castiel protested and Dean guffawed loudly when Castiel broke out into a jaw cracking yawn at the end of his sentence.

“Okay,” he admitted sheepishly. “Perhaps I am a little bit tired.

Dean just smiled at him endearingly and lifted their still laced hands to his lips for a gentle knuckle kiss.

“Is there any chance I can convince you to come to Sunday dinner tomorrow, at Sam and Ruby’s?”

Castiel knew he should say no. Not until he has told Dean the truth. But instead, “I would love to, Dean,” is what fell out of his mouth. He could already envision Gabriel waiting to lecture him. Tomorrow night. He would do it tomorrow night.

“Really? Great. They do an early dinner, around 2pm. After, you could come back to my apartment and we could watch a movie or something?” Dean’s tone was hopeful and Cas found himself nodding.

“That sounds lovely, Dean.”

“Yeah?” he breathed out. “Awesome,” Dean grinned happily before turning on the car.

Traffic on the way back to Cas’ apartment was a little clogged for the first few minutes but broke up fairly quickly. When they arrived at Cas’ building, Dean walked him to his door and pulled him into a tight embrace. Castiel buried his face in the crook of Dean’s neck, relishing in the smell of woodsmoke and apples. He wasn’t sure how long they stood there, but they eventually pulled back, Dean pressing a soft kiss to his temple as he did so.

“Sweet dreams, Cas,” Dean said softly.

“You as well, Dean.”


	11. Chapter 11

 

 

Over the next few weeks, Castiel got to know Dean's family pretty well. He discovered that Ruby’s lewd sense of humor was just the surface, and underneath she had a very nurturing side to her that only came out around family. He learned that Sam's Law Firm focused on environmental law, and had many discussions with him on local community projects to raise awareness on climate control and charities geared towards maintaining the local wildlife, and protecting their habitats. Bobby Singer was an interesting fellow, who showed his approval of him dating Dean by calling him an idjit and letting him know he was welcome over the house anytime.

Evie, and her chocolate lab, Rufus, were by far the most beguiled by Castiel. Evie immediately gave him the nickname bluebird, and insisted that he had pretty blue and black wings. Everyone laughed, but Castiel had been shocked. He had often heard the theory that children and animals were more susceptible to supernatural things, that they would often see ghost of things of a paranormal nature. However, he was not expecting her to be able to describe his wings in minute detail, down to the black spots dotting along the edges of his pinion feathers, Rufus circling him and panting happily. It should have been a clue for him to tell Dean the truth. But somehow, he always managed to put it off. Gabriel had long since stopped trying to convince him, threatening that Castiel would learn the hard way when Dean found out too late.

It all came to a head about a week before Thanksgiving. Castiel was over at Dean's apartment, and they were marathoning season one of Shadowhunters. Though it would have been easier to watch, if they didn't have their tongues down each other's throats.

Since they had been dating, Dean had kept things strictly PG. He seemed to know without Castiel having to tell him, that too much too soon would be overwhelming for him. But the truth was, the angel was getting needy. Every night, when Dean would drop him off at home after one of their dates, Castiel would lay in bed, and touch himself. He couldn't help it, the scent of Dean lingered on him, the memory of his hands touching his body, the feeling of his tongue brushing against his own, always left him achingly hard. Most nights ended with him jerking himself roughly, until his release coated his fingers and he was exhausted enough to sleep.

They laid on Dean’s large sectional, Cas’ back to Dean's chest. His head was turned towards Dean and they were lazily trading drugging kisses. But Castiel could feel it, that need surging up inside of him. Their kisses grew more aggressive and Cas moaned into Dean's mouth, though it came out more like a whimper.

“What is it, angel? What do you need?”

Castiel shifted restlessly, and whispered “More.”

Castiel sighed as Dean began to trail open mouthed kisses down his neck while the hand that held Cas to his chest slipped under the soft hem of the heather grey t-shirt that Dean had taken him to buy months ago. Feeling those fingers trailing up his side's, higher as they brushed against his nipples made Castiel's breath stutter. Unconsciously, his hips arched forward.

“Do you want me to touch you?“  Dean whispered into his skin, and Castiel could only nod. He held his breath as Dean's fingers smoothed down his stomach and paused on the button fly of his jeans.

“Are you sure?” Dean double-checked, ever the gentleman.

Castiel let out a breath he wasn't even aware he was holding, a broken _yes_ escaping his lips.

As Dean's hand slipped underneath Castiel's boxers, calloused palm gently cupping and now touching a part of him that no one aside from himself had before, he let out a deep, guttural groan.

“So responsive,” Dean said sweetly. “I've fantasized about this, you know. Touching you, just like this.”

Dean's confession sent a dark thrill up his spine, and again, Castiel found himself arching up. Dean used his hands to gently tug Castiel’s jeans and boxers down over his hips, urging him to lift up a little bit to make the slide of fabric easier. Castiel's cock twitched as the cool air hit his glistening tip.

“Tell me what you need, angel,” Dean's voice was seductive, smooth like rich honey and it sent shivers coursing through Castiel's body.

“I...I need you to touch me,” he said, reaching his arm out to loop around the back of Dean's neck, fingers digging into the nape.

Dean tugged at the lobe of Castiel's ear with his teeth gently. His hand palmed the tip of Cas’ spongy head, collecting the pool of precome and used it to slick down his shaft. Castiel felt like he was burning from the inside out. The sensation of Dean's hand stroking him firmly had him seeing stars. It was such a different sensation than when using his own hand. Castiel found himself thrusting into Dean's fist and he began giving aborted cries of pleasure.

“That's right, Castiel, take what you need. That's it.” Dean began to pump his hands faster, and Castiel’s breath was nothing but ragged gusts of air. He could feel his dormant grace swirling around inside of him, creeping through his veins and wanting to burst out. The orgasm slammed through him without warning. One minute he was climbing, climbing and then next his vision whited out on a cry of " _Dean!"_

There was the sound of glass shattering, and Dean's awed voice.

“Holy shit, Cas, your eyes...your eyes are glowing.”

Castiel still couldn't even speak. He laid against Dean, panting, his come splattered across his rucked up shirt and dripping down Dean's hand. Slowly, he blinked his eyes and he could feel the power that he had expelled start to settle down. He had to give Dean credit, aside from his rapid heartbeat which Castiel could feel beating a tattoo against his back, his expression remained fairly calm. Castiel wondered if Dean had yet to notice that his television screen was now a shattered mess. Even more impressive, was the hard on that Castiel could still feel digging into the small of his back, because apparently even paranormal activity was not enough to dampen Dean's arousal at getting Castiel off.

Castiel licked his lips, and swallowed past the lump in his now dry throat. He pushed against Dean to sit up straight and automatically reached for the tissues on the coffee table to clean off Dean's hand. He tucked his softening cock back into his clothing, as Dean studied him the whole time. Castiel was sure that he looked nervous. What exactly did one say after being jerked off by their boyfriend and shattering their TV with the unearthly glow of their dark blue eyes?

“So…,” Castiel started, then found he didn't know what to say.

“So,” Dean echoed gruffly, “you wanna explain to me what the hell that was? Aside from the best orgasm ever?”

Castiel was so grateful for the gentle teasing in Dean's voice, that his eyes prickled with tears. How was Dean not running away in terror?

Castiel took a deep breath before leveling his gaze on Dean. “I've been wanting to tell you this for weeks. No, that's not true. Months actually. Since the day we met. My brother Gabriel, he warned me,” Castiel's hands began to shake, and Dean reached out to grip them in his own. Cas gave him a grateful, if not watery smile.

“Cas...what are you?” Dean's voice was soft, calming, as though he were afraid of frightening Castiel, as if he were a scared animal.

Castiel blew out of breath, staring steadily into the mossy depths of Dean’s eyes.

“I'm an angel, Dean. I fell from Heaven, to do penance.”


	12. Chapter 12

“I'm an angel, Dean. I fell from Heaven, to do penance.”

Dean felt a roaring in his head as Castiel stared at him with wide cobalt eyes. His expression waffling between afraid and ashamed and hopeful. Castiel was an angel. He didn't even question it, he just knew it to be true. His reaction should be that Cas was crazy. But everything just made so much more sense now. The dreams. Castiel's eyes. The utter feeling of safety he had whenever he was in the other man's presence.

“You healed me, didn't you?”

“I had to,” Castiel said, his voice pained. “You would have died and I couldn't...I just couldn't let that happen.”

“Why? Not that I'm not grateful, because I am. But obviously what you did got you into trouble, or you wouldn't be here right now. Why did you risk that for me?”

Castiel's expression could only be described as heartbroken. ”Oh Dean, your perception of your own self worth is so staggeringly wrong. Your pure soul is so breathtaking to see, there was no way I could stand idly by and watch a bright light such as yours be snuffed out.”

Dean could feel himself blushing at Castiel's words, and although it made him uncomfortable to be looked at so reverently, he knew without a doubt that Castiel meant every word that he said. Then a thought occurred to him.

“Evie. She could really see your wings, couldn't she?”

“Children are often perceptive to what we as adults don't believe in. She is young, and has an imagination, and hence no filter.”

Dean gave a soft little chuckle. “I have to admit, I'm a little bit jealous. I wish that I could see them myself.”

Castiel's lips worked up and a half smile. “If I could show you, I would. As it is, my grace is extremely muted here. At most I can heal a few wounds, and the fact that I destroyed your television-” Dean couldn't help but laugh at that.

“Don't forget the glowy eyes,” he reminded him teasingly, and then it was Castiel's turn to blush.

“Yes, well it is rather hard to control when you had me so worked up. I did not expect it to result in destruction of property though, and for that I am sorry.”

“So how long is your penance? What exactly was your crime? Is it against the rules for you to help people? Seems a little strange considering you're an angel.”

Castiel sighed. “Humans have this misconception about angels. When they hear of seraphs, little cherubs with fluffy white wings is what usually comes to mind. The angel on top of a Christmas tree with the long golden curls and a Halo. It's all very sweet, but the fact is, angels are warriors of God. We are soldiers. I've been stationed on Earth for many, many lifetimes, in many different forms. My job is to observe. To interfere the way I did, goes against all of our rules. I knew, even as I flew over to you, even as I held you against my body and healed your wounds, that there would be retribution. I was willing to pay it. I was willing to pay because I knew that you were special, and that this Earth would be a much more dismal place without you in it.”

To say that Dean was humbled by Castiel's words would be an understatement. He swallowed past the lump in his throat and looked at Castiel with glistening eyes. “For what it's worth, thank you. I just wish you hadn't been punished because of me.”

Castiel pulled his hands from Dean's grasp, to lift them up to his face. He brought Dean's forehead to rest against his own. “It's worth everything, Dean. I would make the same choice over and over again, every single time. My punishment was to live here on Earth for one year, and then to make a choice.”

“What kind of choice?” Dean found himself asking in a whisper.

“On whether or not I wish to return to Heaven and never set foot on Earth again or to stay here and live out my life as a mortal.”

Dean felt the air leave his lungs, as though he had been punched in the stomach. Cas was _leaving_. The pain of it tore through him like a blade slicing through flesh. He felt nauseous and heartbroken. How was he going to say goodbye to this incredible creature that he had come to love so deeply?

“When do you leave?” His voice came out jagged like glass. “Is it a year to the day that you arrived?”

Castiel tilted his head in that adorable way of his, and looked at him quizzically.

“Dean, I'm not leaving.”

Dean looked up, shocked. “What do you mean you're not leaving? You can't seriously be thinking of giving up immortality to stay here?”

Castiel smiled at Dean with naked affection. “Dean?," he asked gently, "Do you love me?”

Dean's breath caught at the question. They had been together four, almost five, months now, and neither of them had said the words, though Dean himself had felt them for a long time.

“Yeah, Cas, I love you,” Dean said softly, fighting back tears. “but that's not a reason for you to give up your immortality. You can't just stay here on Earth because you don't want my heart to break.”

“Oh, Dean,” Castiel’s voice was harsh with emotion. “Do you not understand? It would not only be your heart that would break if I were to go back to Heaven. Dean, I am so in love with you. The decision to stay was made long before now. I think it was made the moment I saved you, even if I did not know it at the time,” Castiel punctuated his statement with a clumsy kiss that was more a hard press of lips than anything.

“Cas, you say that now. But what if you regret it? What a few years go by, and you age, and you realize that you really want to be back with your family?”

“Dean. My most magnificent love, you _are_ my family.”

Dean could not hold back his tears and they slipped silently down his cheeks as he pulled Cas in tight to him. He breathed him in, that scent of ozone, sunshine and earth.

“Cas...your name really is Castiel, isn’t it?” Dean asked, when he finally released the angel.

“Yes,” Cas said with a soft laugh. “Castiel, angel of Thursday. James Novak was the name of my vessel, given to me freely before he passed."

“So, you’re like, what? Made of light and rainbows on the inside?” Dean half teased and Cas smiled his nose crinkling smile that always made Dean’s heart trip.

“My true form..it can be overwhelming to humans. Essentially, outside of this body I am a multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent.”

Dean waited a beat. “That’s hot.”

After the laughter subsided, Dean found himself yawning. All of the events of the day had him exhausted, but he wasn’t ready to let go of Cas yet.

“Will you sleep with me?”

“Of course, Dean,” Castiel said. “Wait,” he said as Dean rose. “I think I might have enough power to fix this,” he said gesturing to the shattered television. Dean watched in awe as with a flick of the wrist, his flat screen was back to normal.

“Holy shit. Are you sure you’re willing to give that up, man?” Dean asked, dumbfounded.

“For you? Without a doubt.”

They wound up in Dean’s bed, stripped down to their boxers and curled around each other like parenthesis. They were supposed to just go to sleep, but quick, quiet pecks soon turned into long, deep kisses. Hands slicked over fevered flesh and Dean lost his breath when Castiel spoke.

“Make love to me, please, Dean.”

Dean didn’t ask if Cas was sure, he could tell he was by the naked love and want shining in his stormy eyes.

Dean worshipped Cas’ body with soft open mouthed kisses. He found the sensitive spot in the hollow of Castiel’s throat and sucked bruises into the skin. His mouth trailed wetly across his clavicle and drifted down to Castiel’s nipples, tasting that perfect freckle before sucking the tight buds into his mouth, tongue swirling and teeth nipping, making Cas cry out and arch his hips into the air. Dean splayed his hands wide and he ghosted down to Cas’ hips, stilling him, gently.

Dean pulled away for a minute and laughed at Castiel’s pout.

“I need to get this, trust me,” Dean said as he reached into his drawer for a small bottle of lube. He licked his lips as he saw Castiel’s eyes darken. The angel’s cock was already dripping and flushed, proudly slapped up against his freckled tummy. Dean was aching as well, even more so because of his earlier deprivation.

“You should get on your hands and knees, angel. It will be easier for you.”

Castiel moved restlessly against the sheets and bit his lip. “Can’t I stay like this? I would like to see you.”

Dean’s heart just about melted and he smiled gently. “Of course. Lets just get you more comfortable first.” Dean rose to his knees between Cas’ splayed legs and reached over him to grab at one of the pillows. Before going back down, he leaned forward for another lingering kiss.

Dean sat back on his knees and urged Cas to lift his hips. He then spread his knees and had Castiel plant his feet on the bed. Dean caressed Cas’ thighs before trailing his hands down to part his firm cheeks.

“Fuck, Cas, you’re gorgeous,” Dean said reverently and it wasn’t an understatement. Castiel’s pucker was pink and inviting, surrounded by a light dusting of hair. Dean ghosted a finger over the wrinkled skin and he heard Cas’ breath hitch. Dean opened the lube bottle with a snick and coated his pointer with the viscous fluid. He traced Cas’ rim gently before dipping in, carefully working his way up to the knuckle. He could see Cas’ thigh muscles tremble.

“Breathe, angel, just breathe,” Dean instructed and was rewarded with a gust of air and Cas’ opening enough to slide the rest of his finger into his furled entrance. Dean worked him open slowly, stretching him gently, tugging at his walls. When Castiel’s erection began to wane, Dean used his other hand to lightly stroke him as he continued to stretch his hole. By the time he was three fingers deep, Castiel was riding his digits and thrusting into Dean’s fist.

“You doing okay, love?” Dean asked and was rewarded with a guttural moan that had Dean chuckling. His own cock was oozing precome, making a little puddle on the comforter between his legs. Dean had always been a giver in bed, but never had he been so turned on by a lover’s pleasure before. Cas’ rim was slick and puffy and Dean couldn’t resist a taste. He leaned down and brushed his tongue over the fluttering opening and Castiel made a choked noise before he started babbling.

“Dean...oh my, Dean..what are you, ah-” he cut off abruptly as Dean speared his tongue inside along with his fingers. He crooked his pointer, searching out that bundle of nerves that he knew would have Cas lighting up like a firecracker. When his fingers brushed that spot Castiel keened and jackknifed up, clenching around Dean’s fingers like a vice. Dean winked up at him as Cas panted open mouthed, eyes glazed.

“Oh, oh, oh...more. I need more, Dean,” Castiel’s whole body was vibrating and Dean vaguely noticed the lights flickering on and off.

“Don’t worry, angel, I got you,” Dean slid his fingers out and he groaned at the sight of Cas’ hole, stretched and quivering, waiting to be filled. Dean quickly slicked up his cock with more lube from the bottle next to him on the bed. He leaned forward and caged Cas’ head with his forearms. “Ready?” he asked and Castiel nodded jerkily.

“Yes, yes please.”

Dean nudged his cockhead in and slid in without resistance, nice and slow and slick. They both moaned deeply when Dean bottomed out. He held himself still for a moment as Cas shuddered, getting used to the burn and stretch. Dean’s arms were shaking as he fought to keep still, waiting for Cas to signal that it was okay. When he tentatively lifted his hips up, Dean knew that it meant he wanted Dean to move.

Dean started with shallow thrusts until Castiel wrapped his legs around Dean waist and thrusted back with force. The sound of wet slapping flesh sounded in the room and it was obscenely erotic. Dean could feel himself getting close, could feel the telltale tightening of his balls, but he held off, refusing to come before Cas did. Dean hitched Cas’ left leg up over his shoulder, changing the angle and Castiel cried out.

“Oh! Dean, there, please. That’s it, right there, right there,” Cas chanted and Dean put more power behind his thrusts, making sure to hit that same spot over and over. He was going to instruct Cas to stroke himself, but he didn’t need too, as to Dean’s shock, Castiel locked up tight, arching on a silent cry and erupted between them, hot come splashing on their stomachs. It was without a doubt the most gorgeous thing Dean had ever seen and had Dean tripping over the edge and into his own mind blowing orgasm seconds later.

They clung to each other, sweat dampened, come covered skin sticking together and both too blissed out to care.

“I love you, Dean,” Castiel murmured against Dean’s skin and he could tell Cas was drifting off to sleep. Normally he would have suggested a shower, but sleep was pulling him under as well.

“I love you, too, angel,” was the last thing he said before drifting off himself.


	13. Epilogue

_6 months later_

 

Dean sat on his Star Wars comforter on his favorite spot on the beach. From his seat he could see the boats getting set up, the inflatable movie screen already standing upright on the water. It was earlier than usual in the season for this, but it was a special occasion. It was the 100th anniversary of Starfish Bay and the town was celebrating the way it did best; tailgating, bonfires and movies on the beach. The town had voted and tonight’s pick was _National Treasure._

Dean felt weird being there without Cas.  

The past six months together had been more than Dean could hope for. Everytime the fear of Cas changing his mind reared its ugly head, his angel was there to remind him of how much he was loved, and how all he wanted was to stay with Dean, and start their own family and traditions. Castiel made it clear that a mortal life with Dean was all he wanted.

They knew that Castiel would be called back to Heaven to give his decision. They had guessed somewhere around the first week of June, and they had been right. Dean and Castiel had been cuddled on their couch, Cas having moved in with Dean by this point, when all of a sudden Cas went rigid.

 

_Castiel turned to Dean, and cupped his cheeks with his hands. “I must go.”_

_“What? Where...oh. It’s time.” Dean could not stop the stab of fear and the crack in his heart as Castiel gazed at Dean, his impossibly blue eyes filling with tears._

_“I love you, Dean, and I will be back, I promise. Maybe not tonight...I’m not sure what the process of leaving the host completely entails, but trust me. I will be back.”_

_Dean hadn’t even realized he’d been crying until Castiel brushed his tears away._

_“Have faith, my love,” Castiel said to him, before leaning in for sweet, kiss goodbye._

That had been a week ago. And Dean was trying, God, was he trying, to keep the faith. But it had been seven days. Seven days without a word from Cas and Dean was so afraid that the angel had changed his mind. He felt lost, empty and grief stricken. He was thankful it was summer because he didn’t think he’d be able to put on a cheery show for his kindergarteners at this point.

Sam and Ruby thought Cas was up north, visiting family. It was the only thing he could think to tell them.

Dean leaned back against his rock, knees drawn up to his chest as he tried to focus on Nicolas Cage explain how he was going to steal the Declaration of Independence. As he tried to stop the tears from rolling down his face.

“You know, I enjoy this movie immensely, despite its historical inaccuracies,” a gravelly voice came out of nowhere, next to Dean, and he squeezed his eyes shut tight. _Please be real, please be real, please be real._

A warm weight settled next to his side and Dean finally let himself open his eyes. He turned and there he was. All of a sudden everything locked into place. Castiel was here, next to him, wearing the same borrowed Louden Swain shirt and jeans he had left in, and looking at him with so much love and affection that Dean felt giddy and began to laugh before dragging the former angel into his arms.

“You came back! Oh, thank God, you came back!” Dean said, a mix of tears and laughter saturating his voice.

“Of course I came back, beloved,” Castiel said, stroking his hand down Dean’s back soothingly. “I’m sorry I was gone so long, there were things I needed to settle, angel’s I needed to train to take my place. Many goodbyes.”

“I’m sorry you are losing your family,” Dean said somberly and Castiel shushed him with a brush of his lips.

“No such thing. I will see them again, when we retire to our Heaven,” Castiel said softly.

“We get our own Heaven?” Dean asked, sniffling and trying to regain his composure.

“All soulmates get to share a Heaven together, Dean.”

“You think we're soulmates?” Dean asked with a grin and Castiel beamed at him.

“I know so. My father, he and I had a most wonderful talk when I returned. He said he admired my love for humanity. He said that he always knew that I was different, that I was meant for more than just watching,” Castiel carded a hand through Dean’s hair and he sighed at the touch. “He said he created you, with me in mind.”

Dean felt warm all over hearing that. “So you were always mine, even when I didn’t know you, hmm?” Dean said, tugging Cas in again, so he could brush their lips together, arms wrapping tight around him, never wanting to let go.

“Indeed, my love,” Castiel when their lips broke apart. “He said that it was a choice I was always going to have to make, and he had no doubt whatsoever that to me, a lifetime with you…” Cas’ face lit up with a smile so bright Dean’s heart ached just looking at him, “was without a doubt, worth the fall.”

  


The end


End file.
